Are You a Malaysian?

I won't be dissing the government anymore. Nor will I start defending them. No. I've realised something very important amidst all the political chaos and conspiracy outbreaks in the country. The Tourism Minister's alleged mismanaging of certain government funds, the attack of the famous "Anonymous" hacker group on several key websites.

I've encountered a lot of anti-government people these days. Pro-government too. And here we go again, in the epic decision of which I must make; side with the protesters or support the administration.

I've jumped the line a few times. I don't know where my loyalties lie. So many lies, twists and turns here and there! Corruption, greed, hatred and no empathy on both sides at all.

Well fuck that. I'm tired. My dad works for the government. My mom is pro-government. My closest friends consider the government rubbish. My best friend wants to migrate overseas so she can leave this dump.

If you're thinking, "this is a waste of my time, this kid doesn't know anything," well keep reading on, asshole.

Some of the haters are quite dumb. Oh blame the government when the sun is too hot! Now really, that's all our faults. Global warming is a burden of the human race, idiot. Yet in a better light, they make sense. RM1.8 mil on a Facebook page? Really? Block some file-sharing websites, even though Tun Dr. M has clearly stated that the Internet will never be censored back when the MSC was first introduced! What the heck is this?!

Now, now, don't be hating the government. Point out their faults, yes. Poke holes into their "peace" theories, yes. But don't sit on your asses and hope a fucking fairygodmother is gonna pop out and whisk every bad thing away. Once you've pointed out what they've done wrong, how about pointing them in the right direction? Say, instead of using that RM1.8 mil to advertise some bullshit campaign on a social media network, use it to clean up poverty? Hand out some loans to deserving but financially-incapable students? Tell them that. If they don't listen, vote them out on their asses in the next general election.

But noooooooooooo. Instead we decided to fight fire with fire. Instead of doing a petition to ask the higher government to check on the Tourism Minister's personal finance, we create a Facebook page, and indirectly created a breeding ground for government haters. 1Malaysia indeed! Gather more fans for the hate page than the tourism page... and then what? Whoop-de-fucking-doo? We have more fans than you? I feel so fucking stupid for liking that page. What the fuck was I thinking? Why am I saying fuck so many times? Because I'm so fucking angry!

Why? Some of those haters, because they believe the country is on the verge of collapse, they want to flee! Run! Desert the country! You complain that the leaders of our country are so corrupted that they forget about their patriotic duties! What about you? Running away to a country you think is better. I ask you, is that patriotic? Isn't that just fucking hypocritical?

Before you retort, wait! OK, you got the cash to run away and study or start a new life in the UK, or Australia or the States. Well... how about the ones who can't run? The ones who can't afford to go overseas? You'd leave them to rot here in Malaysia when you could have stayed, tried to heal our crumbling administration.

"Meh. If they don't get a PTPTN loan or JPA scholarship, it's not my problem. Every man for himself."

Don't hate if you're just gonna run away in the end. Malaysia is stupid, no doubt. So that just makes our job harder. When the old farts pass on the task is up to us. To heal, to repair, to make the system flourish for the next generation. If not we're gonna end up like the current one, and the future generations are gonna spite us, like we're doing on the old farts.

If you're hating my guts right now, whether you're anti or pro gov, I'm sorry. But you have to hear this. There is too much hate in the air. Too much spite. We're throwing durians at each other instead of trying to patch up old wounds. Empathy breeds kindness.

I am a Malaysian. I am not supporting the government or the anti-government groups. I am justifying our actions. And if that's wrong, maybe we should all run and abandon Malaysia to what it is.

A Letter to the Perfect Guy

Hello, perfect guy. Whoever you are. Where ever you are. I know you go by a lot of names. Mr Right. The One. A bunch of other names which I malas mention. 'Nyways.

I have a friend. A girl, actually. She's sad. She's sad because she's alone. She wants to be loved. So I'm like sending an SOS here.

Get yo ass here, pronto. Sweep my friend off her feet. Dazzle her with your perfect personality. Make her laugh at your clever jokes. Make her smile. Cheer her up when she cries. Listen to her worries. Be patient with her. Love her, like she'll love you.

Because, you know, I'm tired. Not tired of being her friend, no, never, but tired of seeing her sad because of her lonesomeness. Sure, I can make her laugh once in a while, but I want her to be whole. A real smile everyday. Happy because she's loved. When she's happy, I can finally sit down on a sandy beach with a pina colada in my hand, and just wait for that merry jingle of wedding bells that ought to be hers in a few more years.

She gets the man of her dreams, she's happy. You get a smokin' sensitive chick as your special one, you're happy. I see my best friend happy, I'm happy. We're all happy and can pop open a bottle of non-alcoholic wine.

Signed, 

A very concerned friend.

PS: she makes one helluva buttered chicken dish