Wednesday, December 21, 2011

Infatuation Breeds Stupidity

I made a stupid decision and it made me declare 2011 the worst year of my life.

It started with a small brush of emotions, and then it grew uncontrollably, spreading like a virus. And before I knew it, I started to suffer. Long nights with nightmares, flashes of uncertainty and making decisions that ultimately destroyed my common sense.

All year long, I limped on, and on, hoping it'd just leave me alone. Nah. Virus was creeping up my skull and wouldn't let go for anything, short of a suicide attempt.

This is where it got stupid, because, you know, infatuation breeds stupidity.

I made a decision to end it all, and I thought it would like, end well, like others have told me.

No. Stupid decision, worst decision of my life. I hate 2011. I hate it so much I just want to delete that entire history period from my memory and be done with it.

2011 is when I lost my best friend. No, she didn't die. Just. Friends... but close friends no more.

All because I was too stupid. Stupid, stupid, stupid. You had an excellent friend there, but nooooooo, had to fall in love with her. Well done, dumbass.

I'll move on. Alone. Wasn't it always like that?

Last post. I don't really care. Ashes to Flames, no more. It's just... ashes. And pieces of a fucked up broken heart. Oh yeah, and bits of brains too.