Ashes To Flames

Assignment Number 2: Web Safe Area

2012-01-19T22:32:00.000-08:00

I recently collaborated with classmate Joel So to research and produce the results of the second assignment set by our lecturer for Digital Design for Multimedia. These are the resolution screen sizes for Web Safe Area when viewed on the 25'' screen of iMac.

10 things about me (Assignment Mode)

2012-01-19T09:55:00.000-08:00

Hi. This is actually a dead blog, but I would like to dedicate this post to a subject in my course; Digital Design for Multimedia.

So, folks, here's my first assignment.

10 (metaphoric) Things About Me

1. I am like the sky, so majestic and blue, and wouldn't mind to give you bad weather if you're sad (example; if you cry, I'll rain for you)

2. I am like Pluto dwarfed in size by the superiority of the other planets, and hopes get crushed when I realise I'm not listed as a planet anymore.

3. I am like toilet paper, because once people are done with toilet paper, they just throw it away; used and unimportant for the rest of eternity.

4. I am like a patch of yellowing grass on poorly treated soil, lonely and swaying in the wind, with no one to bear love and comfort with.

5. Prozac is like my drug, to make me see the beautiful things in life. Actually, Prozac is a drug. Euphoria-inducing drug.

6. I am not emotional, just forever alone, like the moon in the night sky, surrounded by stars who have each other. And I'm big and round.

7. My best friend is my shadow.

8. I inhale happiness like oxygen but I exhale it like carbon dioxide.

9. My body consists of 80% depression while the rest is fats.

10. I feel like I'm stranded on an island when everyone in my class starts talking in Mandarin. But it's okay. #forever alone

Infatuation Breeds Stupidity

2011-12-21T06:17:00.000-08:00

I made a stupid decision and it made me declare 2011 the worst year of my life.

It started with a small brush of emotions, and then it grew uncontrollably, spreading like a virus. And before I knew it, I started to suffer. Long nights with nightmares, flashes of uncertainty and making decisions that ultimately destroyed my common sense.

All year long, I limped on, and on, hoping it'd just leave me alone. Nah. Virus was creeping up my skull and wouldn't let go for anything, short of a suicide attempt.

This is where it got stupid, because, you know, infatuation breeds stupidity.

I made a decision to end it all, and I thought it would like, end well, like others have told me.

No. Stupid decision, worst decision of my life. I hate 2011. I hate it so much I just want to delete that entire history period from my memory and be done with it.

2011 is when I lost my best friend. No, she didn't die. Just. Friends... but close friends no more.

All because I was too stupid. Stupid, stupid, stupid. You had an excellent friend there, but nooooooo, had to fall in love with her. Well done, dumbass.

I'll move on. Alone. Wasn't it always like that?

Last post. I don't really care. Ashes to Flames, no more. It's just... ashes. And pieces of a fucked up broken heart. Oh yeah, and bits of brains too.

Are You a Malaysian?

2011-06-17T11:27:00.000-07:00

I won't be dissing the government anymore. Nor will I start defending them. No. I've realised something very important amidst all the political chaos and conspiracy outbreaks in the country. The Tourism Minister's alleged mismanaging of certain government funds, the attack of the famous "Anonymous" hacker group on several key websites.

I've encountered a lot of anti-government people these days. Pro-government too. And here we go again, in the epic decision of which I must make; side with the protesters or support the administration.

I've jumped the line a few times. I don't know where my loyalties lie. So many lies, twists and turns here and there! Corruption, greed, hatred and no empathy on both sides at all.

Well fuck that. I'm tired. My dad works for the government. My mom is pro-government. My closest friends consider the government rubbish. My best friend wants to migrate overseas so she can leave this dump.

If you're thinking, "this is a waste of my time, this kid doesn't know anything," well keep reading on, asshole.

Some of the haters are quite dumb. Oh blame the government when the sun is too hot! Now really, that's all our faults. Global warming is a burden of the human race, idiot. Yet in a better light, they make sense. RM1.8 mil on a Facebook page? Really? Block some file-sharing websites, even though Tun Dr. M has clearly stated that the Internet will never be censored back when the MSC was first introduced! What the heck is this?!

Now, now, don't be hating the government. Point out their faults, yes. Poke holes into their "peace" theories, yes. But don't sit on your asses and hope a fucking fairygodmother is gonna pop out and whisk every bad thing away. Once you've pointed out what they've done wrong, how about pointing them in the right direction? Say, instead of using that RM1.8 mil to advertise some bullshit campaign on a social media network, use it to clean up poverty? Hand out some loans to deserving but financially-incapable students? Tell them that. If they don't listen, vote them out on their asses in the next general election.

But noooooooooooo. Instead we decided to fight fire with fire. Instead of doing a petition to ask the higher government to check on the Tourism Minister's personal finance, we create a Facebook page, and indirectly created a breeding ground for government haters. 1Malaysia indeed! Gather more fans for the hate page than the tourism page... and then what? Whoop-de-fucking-doo? We have more fans than you? I feel so fucking stupid for liking that page. What the fuck was I thinking? Why am I saying fuck so many times? Because I'm so fucking angry!

Why? Some of those haters, because they believe the country is on the verge of collapse, they want to flee! Run! Desert the country! You complain that the leaders of our country are so corrupted that they forget about their patriotic duties! What about you? Running away to a country you think is better. I ask you, is that patriotic? Isn't that just fucking hypocritical?

Before you retort, wait! OK, you got the cash to run away and study or start a new life in the UK, or Australia or the States. Well... how about the ones who can't run? The ones who can't afford to go overseas? You'd leave them to rot here in Malaysia when you could have stayed, tried to heal our crumbling administration.

"Meh. If they don't get a PTPTN loan or JPA scholarship, it's not my problem. Every man for himself."

Don't hate if you're just gonna run away in the end. Malaysia is stupid, no doubt. So that just makes our job harder. When the old farts pass on the task is up to us. To heal, to repair, to make the system flourish for the next generation. If not we're gonna end up like the current one, and the future generations are gonna spite us, like we're doing on the old farts.

If you're hating my guts right now, whether you're anti or pro gov, I'm sorry. But you have to hear this. There is too much hate in the air. Too much spite. We're throwing durians at each other instead of trying to patch up old wounds. Empathy breeds kindness.

I am a Malaysian. I am not supporting the government or the anti-government groups. I am justifying our actions. And if that's wrong, maybe we should all run and abandon Malaysia to what it is.

A Letter to the Perfect Guy

2011-06-04T06:51:00.000-07:00

Hello, perfect guy. Whoever you are. Where ever you are. I know you go by a lot of names. Mr Right. The One. A bunch of other names which I malas mention. 'Nyways.

I have a friend. A girl, actually. She's sad. She's sad because she's alone. She wants to be loved. So I'm like sending an SOS here.

Get yo ass here, pronto. Sweep my friend off her feet. Dazzle her with your perfect personality. Make her laugh at your clever jokes. Make her smile. Cheer her up when she cries. Listen to her worries. Be patient with her. Love her, like she'll love you.

Because, you know, I'm tired. Not tired of being her friend, no, never, but tired of seeing her sad because of her lonesomeness. Sure, I can make her laugh once in a while, but I want her to be whole. A real smile everyday. Happy because she's loved. When she's happy, I can finally sit down on a sandy beach with a pina colada in my hand, and just wait for that merry jingle of wedding bells that ought to be hers in a few more years.

She gets the man of her dreams, she's happy. You get a smokin' sensitive chick as your special one, you're happy. I see my best friend happy, I'm happy. We're all happy and can pop open a bottle of non-alcoholic wine.

Signed,

A very concerned friend.

PS: she makes one helluva buttered chicken dish

The Next Phase

2011-04-27T19:28:00.000-07:00

It's been a boring four months. Honestly. I've been rotting at home ever since I took my one month vacation break and I thought it was a bad move, despite the massive amounts of free time. Which of course, led to my downfall... and gain of excess weight.

I have been indulging myself in my hobbies. Went to Genting for a photography competition last week. Sent in an essay for thrills. Watched all TV series known to man. Well, almost all. But really, as 11th of May closes in, I'm getting excited.

College!!

I know, it's probably stale among my mates, as they've started four months ago, but it's still exciting to me. I do feel like I'm the last to join the ranks of tertiary education students , though.

Maddie and Hui Jan joined college in January. Tharini too, I think.

So did Edmund and Joshua.
Ishaq started a week ago.

Even Deric moved to USJ from Sitiawan and is starting this Saturday.
Imran is starting his orientation this Sunday. Mirza's going to the same university with him.

I've got a full two weeks or so before I start mine.

I miss the excitement. I miss the atmosphere. I miss the suspense of catching on to assignments. I miss mingling around people my age worried about almost the same thing! It may be very different from high school, but the concept is there. Studying, finishing projects/assignments. It's just the difficulty is tenfold. And you're fucked if you don't finish any. Heh.

I know some people will probably say, "Heh. You're not missing anything. Wait till you enter college.You'll see."

OK. Let me face it then. I'm not being over-confident here. I just want the thrills. And I hate being left out. Really.

Gay? So what?

2011-04-24T12:30:00.000-07:00

See, when my mom told me about this, I've been thinking long and hard on how I should view this. The whole idea stemmed from the concept of being too free-minded. Youngsters, given the chance to express themselves, and when they take the road that's not considered "normal" by the masses, an issue arises. In this case.... effeminate boys and their tendencies which led to the opening of this boot camp by the Terengganu education department. Well done, boys.

It's more stupid than when Rebecca Black decided to compose "Friday".

I am Muslim, I cannot stress this enough, and I have been taught, ever since I was a foetus, that going the opposite way in sexual identity is plain, hell-deserving, sin-blasted, wrong. If you're a boy, you are a boy. Enough said.

I can think for myself, however. And I certainly don't agree with the "gay boot camp". You do not throw a feminine boy inside a controlled environment and shove instant manhood down their throats. I have an uncle who lives in Singapore, and he has female tendencies. Yes, he speaks with a homosexual flair, walks like one of Heidi's models and even carries a handbag to work! But you know what? He's married to a hot woman from Johor and he has three kids. How's that for effeminate, eh?

The problem we all have, a natural trait of the human race, is that we like to look at a person crooked when their personality is not deemed normal. Thus the stereotyping, the labeling and god-knows racial issues. We point and point, and whisper behind our hands at other people who seem different.

People who know me might actually scoff at this post right now. I have a tendency to hate gays, yes? I do that for jokes. I respect effeminate boys for who they are and I don't condemn them for what they choose. Yes, I poke fun at them but I have no reason for them to disappear from the face of the earth.

The Terengganu education department made a stupid attempt at trying to tone down the rise of effeminate boys. People should be given reign on what they decide, regardless of race and religion. No one has the right to condemn another just because of the choices they make. Perhaps we have the right to punish small evils in this world, but establishing an odd sexual identity is certainly none of those things. Leave 'em alone.

So, go ahead, the extremist Malays and Muslims who read this post. Condemn me for what I think. Call me a free-thinker. Call me blasphemous. Call me a... non-Muslim?

Funny thing is, Muslims respect other people for who they are. Condemn me, and I promise you, minds that work like yours will throw the human race back into the bloody stone age.

And to the "gay" boys who went to the camp... good for you for making new friends. That plan certainly went well.

Stupid Malays.

An Epic Tragedy

2011-04-21T07:41:00.000-07:00

Why the fuck am I feeling so poetic? Oh well!

You know, you know, I remember
once, when I walked down the corridor of my old school
And I saw this chap
He looked at me, and gave a clap,

"HO! Hey," he cried
"wanna hear a story?"

A bloke who favoured skipping class
I didn't pass

"So, there might be people listening, or might read this, because I wrote it down,

and you wanna know what I call it?"

"What, dude?" I inquired

"The Epic Tragedy!
See?"

"So there was a boy.

A young, scruffy-looking ruffian

came to a new place

So strange, so alien to him
so what did he do?

He rebelled against the new environment
He became mean
He became rude
He joined the nasty riders of envy
He was the enemy of many

The ruffian felt good
at first
Power and fear, they were his allies
But then, when break of the year came,
he was alone
in his own world

no friends

but his own power and fear

and that loneliness brought him the first tear

of shame

and regret

When dawn of the new year came,
he was quiet

subdued

and his evil compatriots left him

"he's probably dead, dude,"

said they amongst themselves

but like every book, every Hollywood movie, every piece of literature,

someone came to alight him of his plight

a girl

in such a beautiful light

the ruffian thought she was an angel

and an angel I'm led to believe she was

a beauty that no mortal can pass
without inhaling sharply
a heart that glowed like the lava
in the forsaken volcanoes in the LOTR series

she mended his broken head

treated his guilty soul

and gave him a reason to live

the life which was so young!

the angel-we-all-thought-she-was-but-really-was-exaggerated-for-the-sake-of-the-story,

while she healed her companion

she didn't know
he fell for her

as hard as ridiculous this story is,

that's how hard he fell

but of course, fate was funny, in a funny sort of funny way,
as fate liked to make puppets dangle on her fingers from their strings

so like a terrible contestant in Britain's Got Talent,

he danced and danced around the angel-he-thought-she-was,

unaware that fate was making a joke about him

"So there was this one ruffian..."

I'm sorry, man, one of the reasons

this story is called the Epic Tragedy

is because it is a tragedy!

can't you see?
He, yes, he!

He finds out that she doesn't return his feelings

in a cold, hard truth sort of way
like when Luke Skywalker found out Darth Vader was his father
(NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO)"

"But but but, you crazy bastard," I protested
"why is it epic? It's like any other love story I've heard.
Epic, my foot."

"It is epic, my chubby class-skipper,"

he almost jumped, crying
"because the ruffian did not run and cower

when the truth was laid in front of him

The pretty lil tenshi (angel in Japanese) revered love

and set forward to find her own

without knowledge of the ruffian's affections

But the ruffian did not stop her, like a jealous zealot would

no, you fatty, you know what the ruffian did?"

"WHAT?!" I shouted. "Summoned Aslan? Found the seventh Hocrux? Destroyed the Vulgari?
What, man, WHAT?!"

"He became her sword.
He took his own heart, knowing it would be of no use,

fashioned a sword

and defended her from evils and danger.

In memory, he was the ruffian

whose evil drowned with him

and was healed by the kind Angelo (Italian for angel)

But in heart.

He was her sword.

Thus, O cholestrol-covered buddy,

the tale

of such

an Epic Tragedy."

"Oh." I looked at the fellow.
Then I grabbed his arm.
"An epic tragedy that may be... but a far more miserable tragedy it may be

if you don't see a doctor."

"OH SCREW YOU, FATTY."

I was feeling whimsical. Do not judge me. Is there a hidden story there? I don't know. This isn't Inception. Dreams within dreams. Or maybe it is. Are you SURE you're not dreaming now? HORRRRR--

Water and Blood

2011-04-16T08:58:00.001-07:00

Sigh. So much fear. So much pain. So much suffering.

It's water and blood, folks.

Water and blood.

I know this girl...

2011-03-16T11:30:00.000-07:00

I know this girl.

She's a pleasant person, really.

Nice to talk to.

Someone you could throw a couple of dirty jokes around without being scrutinized at.

A wonderful person.

But underneath that smile she shows to everyone everyday... there's a lonely heart.

One that cries almost every day.

One that beats to the steady rhythm of sorrow every day.

A heart that bleeds out toxic pain.

But still.

She tries hard.

Kick her down, and she'll stand right back up.

She'll kick you back. In the balls, if she's in a funky mood.

She'll always have a smile, not that psychotic smile, but the "fuck it, I'm still breathing" kind of smile.

Yeah, she breaks down a couple of times.

Shed some tears for someone who's kinda oblivious.

But she'll get back up.

And when she does, she's stronger than ever.

Don't tempt her into her "I'm gonna get you sucka" mode.

She'll beat your breakfast, lunch and dinner right out of you.

But still the toxic pain.

The longing, the wishful thinking.

Oh, who am I to say.

I know this girl.

Kinda lucky for me.

My only regret is that I couldn't help her ease her pain.

It's a tremendously powerful, spiky, black, twisting sort of pain.

One that might take years to disappear.

Screw you, non-believers, she's gonna pull through.

She might have lost all hope.

But I haven't.

Not in her, no.

With the way she's handling that bitch-beast of a pain...

I'm proud of you, miss.

Keep going.

Is it too late for a Happy Valentines?

2011-02-26T19:48:00.000-08:00

I forgot about Valentines actually. Then somebody reminded me of it... in a very cruel way. But I'm all OK about it now, and I dedicate this video to everyone out there. Happy Valentines Day! Sorry it took quite a while...

Hungry for the lyrics? I was.

I don't wanna go back home
I don't wanna kiss goodnight
Let us paralyse this moment until it dies
To the end of the earth
Under the valley of the stars
There's a car crashing deep inside my heart

Take a ride through the avenues
Across the great divide
There's a siren screaming "I'm alive,'' it cries

Red alert is the color
Of your paper valentines
Intertwined on this moment passing by

Take a ride through the avenues
Across the great divide
There's a siren screaming "I'm alive," it cries

Red alert is the color
of your paper valentines
Intertwined on this moment
passing by

Oh, come away with me tonight
with cigarettes and valentines

Cigarettes and Valentines!

So, come away with me tonight
with cigarettes and valentines

Oh, come away with me tonight
with cigarettes and valentines

Cigarettes and Valentines!

Justin Bieber Must Die

2011-02-26T08:07:00.000-08:00

I'm just joking about the title.

I was never a fan of Justin Bieber. I just didn't think of him much. There is a joke on Facebook where first-time listeners of JB will think, ''Wow, that girl has a nice voice''. That actually happened to me. No kidding. Even my mom went, ''Who's this girl?'' when she first heard his mega-hit, ''Baby''.

''He's a boy? I think you're wrong la...''

No, really, Mom. It's a he.

I didn't think much about it as I resumed my life. Yes, I heard the occasional ''oh my god, he's so dreamy!'', ''his voice is so cuuuuute!'', ''I LOVE him!'' and so on... And then I discovered the haters. A very impressive haters database, JB has. His music video, "Baby" which was declared the most watched video in Youtube history (400 million views) had the unbalanced numbers of loving fans and sarcastic trashers (500 k likes, 900 k dislikes). And since most of my friends didn't like JB either (even the girls, astonishingly) I went along and started trashing the ''teen hearthrob'' as well.

'Justin Bieber's a BOY?'

JB: You sparkle. You sure you're a vampire, not a fairy?
Edward: You sound girly. You sure you're a guy?

'Shame on those people who posted RIP Justin Bieber on FB. It's not nice to bring up people's hopes that way...'

Yes, yes, I followed the trend of hating JB since it was the majority of the masses. In some small way, I didn't like him too. The way he swishes his hair, says pitifully that he just got lucky with his fame, and the oh-so-agonising repeats of his song, 'Baby, baby, oooo like baby, baby--'

Then when I looked at the situation, a question hit me; ''Why do I hate Justin Bieber?"

Which in turn revealed itself in a bigger spotlight. ''Why do people hate Justin Bieber?''

So since I had nothing better to do, I scourged the net for information. Fans, critics, haters and the in-betweens, the closet fans and so much. Of course, the answers I found were a bit one-sided, one way or the other. Here's an example of a comment from a, I think the term is, ''Belieber'';

OMG I love JB so much! He sings like an angel <3 <3 <3 I love you Justin! Please keep singing and don't worry about the haters, you still have us to always always always love you!!! <3 <3 Justin!!!!! xoxoxox FUCK YOU haters you're just jealous because he's famous and he is NOT GAY!

That's probably along the lines of one of these hardcore fans. Take a look at a bona fide hater's comment. Taken from the official FB page of The Justin Bieber Haters;

Justin Bieber Haters; gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay

Well, it might not seem much, but one word says it all.

The Beliebers believe in Justin Bieber as a messiah in the teen world. Some sort of messiah, if I say so myself. Someone so young, so pure, singing about his heart's woes about some chick who's playing hard to get (Baby) and the pain of trying to be there for someone you love (You Smile, I Smile) or loving someone to the point where you tell them non-stop 'I love you' (One Time, ironically). That, with his hair-swish action, melts the hearts of a thousand lonely girls out there every day. Edward Cullen has some competition.

The haters play a darker role in JB's fame, criticising his voice, his looks. Some say this is jealousy of his obviously inflated popularity. Well, at 15 and you have a Ferrari and chicks after your heels and you need a bodyguard? Against girls? That's something to envy about. The smaller, more sensible role of haters is to show the world how fake JB is. A comment I found on Yahoo! Answers cleared some of my confusion;

It's not him as a person, but he is the culmination of how far mass media has fallen and people are getting sick of it. His music is not good. At all. People only think he's good because the people around them say that he's good. And those people only say that he's good because they think the people around them like him. In other words, Justin Beiber is a bad trend. A fad. People should not be getting famous and making tons of money by being a fad. Pretty soon, Beiber will be completely forgotten. Hopefully, the record companies won't find another Beiber to take his place.

Now, this fellow's comment is actually very logical and I very much agree with it. Maybe it's the word of mouth and looks that made JB popular as a god as he is now, but it's always better to tone down your craziness over a 16-year-old pre-pubescent singer. Try listening to other music too. *cough*GREEN DAY*cough*

And the haters! Hating someone just because they made (f*cking shit-loads of) money is not right. Making fun of JB is alright, gives everyone a few laughs, but hating him with the sheer power of burning hell? Just because he's famous? Because he's rich? Because of the screaming chicks at his concert? That's called jealousy and hatred, two common sins.

Maybe he is defacing music, ruining the very image of it, and getting money out of it. But in my opinion, JB will not last. Yes, years from now, his songs will still be on the air, but that rock star fame won't be with him anymore. Just another passing shooting star. But I guess I won't hate Justin Bieber anymore. Nor will I like him. I'll just be indifferent. Being in between two factions is very awesome. Thanks for visiting!

Psychometrics: Attachment, Caring and Intimacy

2011-02-21T05:36:00.000-08:00

Okay. I've been talking nonsense for the past few months. I never really chose on a topic to blog about. Time to get back on track. Time to show my followers down there, right hand-side panel there, why they followed my blog.

Because I talked interesting crap.

But before that, allow me to express my insanity over what's to come in the next two weeks or so.

...

HOLY SHIT SPM RESULTS ARE GOING TO COME OUT SOON, I AM SOOOOO SCREWED, I DIDN'T CARE THEN, BUT CRAP, I CARE ABOUT IT NOW, IT'S LIKE DOOMSDAY AFTER BREAKFAST AND WHY THE HECK IS EVERYONE AT THE OFFICE MAKING A FUSS OUT OF IT, I'M THE ONE WHO'S GONNA PICK UP THE RESULTS, MY As ARE SOOOOOOO GONE--

...

Okay. That felt much better. *Phew*

Now, now. What do we have for today?

Right. Psychometrics; and its role in attachment, caring and intimacy.

Okay, okay. To put in a simpler way... I'm talking about love.

*audience goes ''awwwwwww crap'' *

Aw, don't worry. I'll make it less tormenting as we go along. I know you're interested. So, go on.

Now, I've explained about love before. I think it was from this lil post right here. Here's a more definite take on this world-class celebrated emotion.

Taken from everybody's favourite website, Wikipedia--

Love is a universal concept related to affinity, with different interpretations depending on the point of view taken (personal, philosophic, artistic, religious, scientific). In the Western World, love is considered an emotion of strong affection and personal attachment.^[1] In philosophical context, love is a virtue representing all of human kindness, compassion, and affection. In some religious contexts, love is not just a virtue, but the basis for all being, as in the Christian phrase, “God is love” or Agape in the Canonical gospels.^[2] Love may also be described as actions towards others (or oneself) based on compassion.^[3] Or as actions towards others based on affection.^[4]

So basically, love is something of a language. Some would say language of the heart. I'd partially agree on that, because love is something that can be felt by one or more hearts.

But love is also something of an emotional pain-- the raw want of to love, and to be loved in return.
Especially if two hearts feel the same, the pain would be more constant. You know someone out there has the same feelings for you, but you also know environmental (or in most cases, social) causes that love to be difficult to be achieved.

You get stories spun out of this relative fact, and there's Romeo and Juliet as proof.

However, the pain is more evident if only one heart feels the emotion while receiving nothing in return. The basis for it is still the pain of want, but coupled up (no pun intended there) with the pain of rejection... we have what the world calls heartbreaks.

Of course, the masses would agree with me when I say that the pain of heartbreaks is worst than the pain of wanting love. There's also some individuals who'd like to take their heartbreaks to the maximum, say the tragedy of Alviss Kong.

No disrespect to the late Mr. Kong, but suicide was never really the answer. Yes, he was rejected by a girl who he had claimed to be in love with, but in the end, after releasing himself from emotional pain with physical pain (which evidently lead to his death) he had not only hurt (killed, actually) himself, but his family, friends, and the girl whom he harbored a crush on.

Imagine how the girl is coping with the guilt now. Survivor's guilt, dear readers.

It has been proven many times that when someone loses faith in love, he loses faith in everything. His job, his dreams and even religion. Very, very dangerous outcome, this is. One has to be optimistic no matter how grim things are.

Never lose hope. Yes, that's what I say to everyone. It's hard, I know. I've lost hope so many times, I always felt hypocritical when I say this to someone else. But I try. And I'd like it if everyone else did. So much to do in this life!

Back to the matter at hand, love grows at a steady rate, especially if the situation -- as people say -- clicks. Based on psychometrics, there are three levels of growth: attachment, where someone latches a piece of their feelings for another on a sub-conscious level. Caring, when the person's feelings are stimulated with emotions such as worrying or concern for another and finally intimacy; where that person feels a unique bond with another, and it's not individual, but shared by both, supported by the first two levels of growth.

Most of you will probably wonder why I'm just typing these facts out. But facts block the truth of one's heart, no? No one ever liked facts. Facts just provide the shadow of an inanimate object, to make it more believable in the real world, disregarding if people like it or not.

This includes love.

I'm saying love is a wonderful thing. Pure, ever-existing, and always the positive light in our dark universe. It can't be contaminated like power or wealth. It's a driving force in life, and pushes us to do things we normally hesitate to do. Achieving a dream, success in life... and finding someone to love.

But you can drown in it. Too much of a good thing, you see. People get beaten down by love everyday. Hearts get broken, tears are shed. It's not only romantic love, but family love as well. Impersonal love, where one loses aim in everything.

I know. I've heard. I've seen. I'm touched by their stories, and I feel for them. It hurts me as well, and I can do nothing but to console them. But I know they'll keep on going, with love as a driving force, to hope.

Hope for the best.

In reality, love kinda sucks. But people still go after it.

I wonder why.

You Seeing Double?

2011-02-08T00:22:00.000-08:00

Ain't that just cool? And AWESOME?
High -LEGENDARY- Five!
Get it?

Hee hee.

Devil May Cry... and I won't blame him

2011-01-30T21:32:00.000-08:00

This is the old Dante. (from Devil May Cry 4)

This...

... emo-gothic, stoned punk...

...is the new, younger Dante.
(from DmC Devil May Cry)

What the heck are you doing, Capcom? Giving one of your most prized possessions into the hands of a noob video-game developer like Ninja Theory? You were better off developing your own games!

And... Dante? His silver hair. Silver hair!!! That was iconic. And now... this??? And smoking??!

I'll cut the game some slack for now. It is an origin story, and it'll probably shed more light on the bad-ass hero's history in the Devil May Cry series.

I hope DmC won't let me and the other fans down.
The trailer was... meh.

It was cool, actually, if you set aside the ''ruining-the-iconic-look'' concept.

Meh.

DmC Devil May Cry Debut Trailer

The Legendary Photographer

2011-01-30T05:06:00.000-08:00

Yes, I am a photographer for The Malay Mail.
In fact, I'm a journalist too.
I'm a photo-journalist.
Two things strung into one, and they say it's rare.
There's a staff photojournalist there too, but she's a hag, if I do say so myself.

One day, during an assignment, I got chased away. By a pack of angry bus operators.
Now people, I'm trying to help you out.
I'm not from Harian Metro trying to dig out some dirt on you.
I'm from The Malay Mail, trying to find the cause of why you guys got stranded without a proper terminal.
But one middle-aged lady scornfully came up to me and said with utmost evil, ''Kid, scram, we don't need nosy photographers like you from Harian Metro to make us look bad; we're already in a bad spot here,''

Indignantly, I tried to protest, ''I'm not--''

With a growl, the ugly lioness menacingly said, ''Scram or we'll beat you up,'' she signaled other ugly lions and panthers (boars too, I think) and what was I suppose to do?

Yes, I ran. I caught up with my partner reporter and said, ''DUDE, we need to get out of here--''

''What? I've had a nice interview with these stall traders here--''

''The bus operator demons are after my BLOOD!''

He nodded wisely, pulled out the keys to his Kancil, and said, ''Understood. Let's roll,''

Back in the sanctuary of The Malay Mail's HQ, we told our tale to our Editor. When the scene of the attacking bus operators was mentioned, the Editor laughed.

I was wide-eyed. Dude, if I stayed longer, the operators would've run me down with their mammoth-buses.

And he spun his own tale, of a former photographer -- a girl -- fresh from UiTM, who defied the laws and took some illegal pictures, got caught, but with some magic and charm, got away, clean. Front page material, baby.

''Now her name was Hani -- no, not the Hani you know now, another Hani (there was another photographer Hani) -- yes, she was aggressive, vivacious and seductive when she needed to be. I remembered her as so. Very small, petite, one might say, and she could crawl through the smallest spaces in which big-sized people'' -- he looked at me, but then tactfully looked away in a flash -- ''couldn't fit through. Any photography assignment which required stealth... dear Hani was the one for it!

''A few years ago, KTM (Keretapi Tanah Melayu) bought these new train engines, claimed to be used for the public. They were bought, but never used due to some undisclosed reasons. They were kept in storage, but KTM denied so and so. Millions of RM spent on these train engines, but was never seen or heard of.

''So The Malay Mail got itchy. We wanted pictures... but of course, we couldn't get them legally. So then we got a tip off about the engines' location. We couldn't get in-- so we sent Hani.

''Hani, bless her, she crawled under the rusty gates and climbed through a hole in one of the warehouses. And snap-snap-snap she went when she found the missing engines. But alas, it didn't go well for her. She was caught by the guards while she was trying to leave!''

My partner and I gasped. For dramatic effect, of course.

''With her cute over-sized eyes and quivering lips, she said, and she really did say this, ''Please, sir, I'm a UiTM student, I didn't know this area was off-limits, if I knew, I wouldn't have taken pictures of it for my final semester project! Please sir, I'm so, so, so very sorry!''

''And would you know it, the guards let her go. Melted their hearts, she did. She came back to the office, joyous with her victory and submitted the photos. Next day was a field day for us. How did The Malay Mail get those photos? Well, as we told our competitors, it was a trade secret; our legendary photographer, Hani.''

The Editor finished his tale with a smile. ''Now, Amirul, I expect you to show the same commitment as Hani did. Though I suggest you don't pull the Puss'n'boots mushy stare move like Hani did. You'll get an angry mob if you do that. When worse comes to worst-- run.

''Other than that, good job, both of you. Nice photos.''

Legendary photographer.
What a thrill!
If only I could meet her!
The courage!
The deception!
And she's cute!
I'll live up to your standards. Or maybe be better than you!

We'll see.

A Change of Pace

2011-01-17T06:53:00.000-08:00

I've said it before. But you readers know me. I always like to repeat myself.

It's a change. A massive change in not just my life, but everyone else. Everyone of the same age, I mean.

It's normal, I guess. An average Form 5 student graduates from school after completing his SPM examinations, and enters the world of pre-adulthood. Still immature, uneven on the edges, but very, very close to being a full-fledged adult.

That, folks, is where the change happens. And I must tell you, it is quite a big change. I applaud to some, who managed to just go through the transition with ease. And I am sympathetic with those who have a hard time growing used to that change.

Because, obviously, I'm one of those people. Poor, poor souls who miss the old life in school uniforms, the rag-tag freedom of feeling unoccupied with nothing but schoolwork, and that nagging, somehow ironic thought of ''can't wait when I'm done with school--''

But now, thinking about it again, I'll have to call myself a hypocrite.

Exactly one year ago, I saw that ''change'' in one of my school's former Head Prefects; Yie Hahn. Always suited up, always ready, always alert in his school days. Then, after leaving school and returning for a short visit, I saw a remarkable change in his exterior: unshaven face, baggy eyes, normal attire for an office worker and maybe the sluggish body movement of a drunkard. I'm not saying he ended up bad; no, but it seemed that the change hit him quite hard.

I scoffed at the thought. That would never happen to me, I thought. And of course I was wrong.

I went to my old school the other day. I had no beard, not even a shadow of it. But with my work shirt, a bagpack with my camera gear inside and that irritating green pass ''Pas Pelawat'' pinned on my breast pocket-- I saw the younger 'uns looked at me as I have looked upon Yie Hahn one year ago.

The change had hit me.

You get older, you get wiser. New friends gained, old friends drift away. New paths which you have to clear for yourself and ultimately, the choice of doing what is wrong and what is right in the world.

I can't bloody change even if I'm in the ''change'' phase. A change of pace, folks. It's a change of pace.

What Up, 4 in the Morning

2011-01-08T12:05:00.000-08:00

You may ask.

What the hell am I doing up at four in the morning?

I mean, morning prayers are at 5.30-ish... and you're up at 4AM?

Well, folks. To be honest. I'm in love.

Something wonderful, terribly wonderful at the bottom of my heart, right now, but I'm sure, like a suffering drunkard, I'll wake up with a headache in the morning. Or rather, heartache. Whichever you prefer, really.

The joy and beauty of something in a dream! I'm looking forward to that right now. My room's in a mess, I'm supposed to wake up early for a Law-studies talk tomorrow (or rather, today) at Taylor's, and yet, I'm unfaltering from typing this somehow bimbotic post. *winks, Jacie*

Well then. Off to bed. Cheers! And good morning!

Another Year... Hi, 2011

2011-01-06T04:49:00.000-08:00

Sorry I didn't post one up for the new year, I was feeling lazy, and opted for the clouds post since it was so... peaceful. Well, peace is almost over now, into the hustle and bustle of the fresh start of another year on planet Earth. College, work... and so much more.

Half my friends are off to college, Hui Jan, Maddie, Joshua, Ganesh... so rajin, these January-intake goers. The other half (which I am quite proud to be amongst) have gone on the road of job-hunting. One can be quite cerewet with the requirements that come with the job. ''What are the working hours?'' ''How many off-days I get in a week?'' ''How's the pay?'' and the most popular one, ''Do I have to wear a uniform?''

Yes, yes, a lot of moans here and there, but I got a job as a waiter at Sri Melaka restaurant in One Utama. The first two days were tiring but I gained a few things which I'm sure would be useful somewhere, sometime in the future. I planned to work for three months, then out of the blue--

My rejected internship application at the Star, was accepted by another newspaper company, the Malay Mail.

Not a newspaper giant like the Star or NST, but adequate for someone like me. I've just worked on my resume and sent it to the Editor-in-Chief last night via email. I received a call this morning from a Mr. Jonathan Chong who told me to report to Malay Mail's office at 9 o'clock in the morning on Monday.

My dad said my resume was quite good, and I did it without remembering all the details given by this lecturer lady who came to school to give Form 5s speeches on how to prepare resumes. *beams*

Nervous? Perhaps I'm on the same track with newbie college students.

A lot of things have been going on, as the old year breaks into the new, as it is inside my head. People around me are changing, as they move up and further, through a thin veil which separates immaturity and adulthood. Some may stay just at the border to retain that sense of foolish youth, but I see mostly jump through, happy to leave the child-like feeling behind and embrace what they think is freedom.

Don't get me wrong. Everyone wants to grow up! Everyone has that right! And if that's what you want, go ahead. We all deserve a piece of it. But I just like it here, on the other side of the veil very much. Sooner or later, yes, I know, I'll have to move and step over. But for now... I'll just wave from the other side.

Maybe this internship and soon, college, will help me cross over. Or I might just stay on that borderline between foolish youth and wise adulthood.

Look at me rant. It's been a while. Feels good. Good luck, to all college-goers, part-timers, and so on. Happy new year, and I hope the best comes out of 2011 for all of us. I don't know if it's dark days or sunshine ahead of us in the future, but everyone needs a lil cheer. Cheers then! Thanks for reading!

My head in the clouds...

2011-01-01T06:48:00.000-08:00

Hi, folks! I've just came back from Singapore a few hours via plane. Singapore's been fun, my family and I visited Universal Studios. Photos are here. A good and long six days, five nights there, and though going to Singapore for the second time gave experience, I'm happy to be back in Malaysia.

One thing I like about flights. As you look out through the plane windows, through that reinforced glass, you could get an up and close view of the clouds. Yes, simple as they may seem, but the view, if looked upon closely... you can see the wonders of it.

See how the blades turn, against a background of clouds.

The opening in the centre of looks like an opening of the sea along the lines of a sandy beach.

The sun shines radiantly, and the clouds' curves capture the light, shadowed upon the stratosphere.

These clouds may look like a puffy white cotton ball, but they potray the serenity and peace of mind, when someone is really high, up in the sky. Thus, the saying, ''head in the clouds.'' See ya, folks! Thanks for reading.

It was almost New York

2010-12-24T00:56:00.000-08:00

It was almost, almost New York. People, lights, dances, music and the waiters.

The waiters. You bloody idiots, you had to wear a black and white attire like me, eh?

And I could only applaud on your appetizer, cream of mushroom soup.

But I could gladly say apart from the food... SA and SAS Prom 2010 wasn't so bad. It wasn't glorious until I wished it would happen again (unless it repeated itself in a desirable condition) but it wasn't so horrible until I thought it was a total waste of time.

It was good, though it could have been better.

The mushroom soup and the prom itself.

But I had a good time. Albeit some... inconsistencies and distortions. But that's a story for another time, when I'm ready.

Right now... The Golden Apple, New York. Where? The majestic 6-star hotel of Kuala Lumpur, One World Hotel. They could have served better chow.

The event started late. The general message was everyone had to be in front of the Topaz ballroom exactly at 7.00pm, and no later than 7.45pm or the doors will be closed. But we started at 8.00pm. Pfft, Malaysian timing.

Daniella Sya and Christian Neil Capes were the MCs for the prom. Daniella was okay, but seriously, Christian needed lessons on how to pronounce names. Just because you're half-Singaporean, doesn't mean you have to act like you're from Europe, mate. Nevertheless, they hosted the prom well enough and steered clear of being complete lame-joking deadbeats.

To be honest, the highlight of the prom (other than spending time with your dear friends, awww) was the performances. The rock band which made their music out of the clash of drums and careless strumming was just ear-sickening. Khairul's band, the House Bunnies (house band, what up) were excellent, my congratulations to them for raising their street cred. The other bands were kinda cool too. There was a three-man band with three acoustic guitars playing slow songs for *cough* couples.

My date, everyone, was the ever-lovely Nabeela. Yes, I think she was the only girl who wore a tudung to prom. But she was still pretty.

''Radical, Bob, she looks like Cinderella.'' says Khairul.

''Yeap, Cinderella just converted to Islam, dude.'' was my reply.

The dances were errr... kinda enjoyable I guess. Adrian and Tharini dragged Nabeela and I on the dance floor. Soon we were joined by Maddie and her date, Drakie. We swapped dance partners for a few minutes, Drakie and me.

Man, was that weird AND awkward.

The night continued on with games and photos and so on. When the clock struck 12, the prom ended. Good thing too, coz the now-Muslim Cinderella had to go back. Goodbyes and hugs were exchanged and I already felt some sort of weight pulling my heart down. I wasn't going to see half of the people there in a long time. I wondered if I would remember them when years pass.

Then I mentally slapped myself as I packed my gear. Of course I will.

The Golden Apple, New York was a moderate success folks, and we all sorta enjoyed it. Below are the photo albums on Facebook.

Is It New York??!!
Prom 2010 - The Golden Apple, New York

Thanks for reading folks!

I have something to tell you

2010-12-22T14:45:00.000-08:00

The lights were dimmed. The music was loud, but soft. Soothing lyrics flowed from the speakers.

It was on.

Her hand rested on your shoulder, while the other gripped your own in a fashion. Your own hand was on her right hip. Feet sliding effortlessly on the dance floor to the steady rhythm of the music.

You looked into her eyes, and she looked back. Her face in surrounded by a curtain of hair, which reflected the very little laser lights dancing around in your dance with her.

You gulped. Gulped very hard. Then you spoke;

''Uhm... I have something to tell you.''

Blood rushed to your face, and you felt your cheeks grow warm. Heck, she had the same reaction.

''Yes?'' was her timid reply.

...

Silence.

...

And then...

''Uhm... your heel is on my foot.''

PROM WAS AWESOME! FULL REPORT COMING SOON!!!

Hey, You

2010-12-20T09:21:00.000-08:00

A lil thank you to the lovely Ms. Madeleine Teh; yes, I am awesome. Take it, sis.

Okay, so what do we have? Ah yes... prom.

So. After... what, a week? A week of getting ready for this gig, decorations, buying ink, fiddling around with strips of aluminium foil... and so on. Hey, it was cool coz Maddie was there, yeah. She even offered her place as the decor's base of operations.

It was like a philharmonic concert there, folks, the brother practices the piano for hours. I got the Nutcracker and other musical pieces replaying in my head all the time now. Wickeddddd.

I watched Tron: Legacy a few days ago. It was awesome, and amazingly awesome. I'm watching the original Tron now. I gotta say... in T:L, the discs battles are waaaaaaayyy better. In Tron... it looked like they were playing catch with glowing Frisbee discs which could slice you. In T:L, these discs could still cut you, but it would cut you in slo-mo.

Yeah. Just like that. Ouch.

But the light cycle scenes in the original are more intense, no doubt. Ah, just watch it folks! Truly a must see this jolly Christmas season!

I have my suit. I have my camera. I have my printer (it's Sarah's actually) and I'm all set to go. Tomorrow morning I'm off to One World hotel, to check out the place for prom one last time. Then maybe register for driving lessons.

Yes, I already went for the theory talk for 5 hours... but haven't paid or registered yet. Whoops.

The talk was nuts. And bull. And balls. What the hell.

Almost there, Madeleine. Almost. Then you can enjoy your holidays. We all can enjoy our holidays.

Merry Christmas and a happy new year to everyone! See ya, folks!

And here we go...

2010-12-11T08:24:00.000-08:00

Hey guys! SPM just finished last Wednesday. Well, not for those who are taking extra subjects (moi) but the hard ones (Biology, Physics, Sejarah) practically the mean ones...

They.

Are.

Over.

And so begins the waiting. The three-month anxiety, covered by layers of extreme enjoy-yourselves time, after spending one year or more being hooked to chains of your desk, flirt with your boyfriends and girlfriends (more text messages and calls, oh god, the phone companies are gonna have a field day) and so much more. Well, there are those excited ones starting early in college. Good luck to y'all, coz you know, you make us March-intake goers look lifeless as we just stare at television and poke people on Facebook all day loooooooooooooooooooong.

Naw, seriously. Good luck! Short three week holiday, tho. Heh.

Yes, I am one of those March-intake fellows. I've considered of taking January intake, but looking at the calendar a few times... I just spent the whole year studying (yes, I played class clown in Form 4) and after a break I jump back into studies? Naaaaaah. My Trials results were qualified for a few applications like the one in The One Academy (I've had my eye on Advertising and Graphic Designing for quite some time before I was interested in law) but I was thinking I'd be rushing into things. Why not nature take its course?

I now have three months of... what the hell, I should've taken that application. Damn it!

...
...
...

Just my lil joke, folks. No, I have an internship with The Star for a period of three months starting in January. Yeah, my parents insisted I give journalism a try. I think they disagree (silently) with my decision to enter the field of lawyers, ever since that case of the mutilated cosmetics queen. And why do people make jokes about lawyers?

From How I Met Your Mother;
Marshall: You've just been lawyered.
Barney: Lawsuit-up!!

Lawyers do make a lot of money.

Yes, yes, I heard you say, ''dirty money''.

I'll work with the Attorney-General Chambers, and maybe go for the position of Chief Justice... when I'm 50 or so. Hey, what's wrong with dreaming, right??

But now, ladies and gentlemen, my attention is one one thing... a very anticipated event. Yes, that's what I'm talking about.

Prom. Yeah, Sri Aman and Samad's Prom, themed after New York, New York! Or something, I forgot the whole title thingy on Facebook.

Yes, about prom. There have been certain... distortion in the sound waves of peace. (!) I'm sorry, Physics paper was kinda infectious, it jumps off your cerebellum and into your... (!) whoops, was that a Biology fun fact?

Anyway, prom!

Some people... (the ones who aren't coming) are pissed about it. (Let it be known as Group Some People 1)

Some people... (the ones who organised it) are pissed too, coz the other some people were pissed about it. (Group Some People 2)

I am obliged to pick a group (the second one, sorry, I'm part of the committee) but I won't. Because I like to be a team player and voice out the err... distortions in the sound waves of peace. Man, I'm good.

The prom, without doubt, is flawed. Why? Yes, plausible reasons, so and so, but still, flawed. The group of Some People 1 is right to be angry, prom is an audacious event! Memories are to be created there, friends' company to be enjoyed, precious moments to be looked upon and adored in the future! Perfection is of the utmost importance, and never to be done halfway! Bagai melepaskan batuk di tangga... (!) what the heck, sorry folks. BM paper's over. Sorry. Point is, people who organise prom (Group Some People 2) should have worked harder on it. How dare they. This is prom! Not a half-assed school project for extra-credit!!!

But Group Some People 1. When voicing out, be gentle. Violence or foul-mouthing is never the way. You'll just make the organisers feel bad about it and utterly demoralised. And the prom itself will end in a much more disastrous manner. Alright, the prom has holes, too many holes to be patched up and sewed on to achieve satisfaction, but you have to remember. Group Some People 2 is composed of humans. Very talented humans who want nothing more than the same thing you want: a good time with dear friends for the very last time. They work hard too, as much as we all worked for SPM. Give some credit, if not the smallest piece of gratitude.

There are faults on both sides. Maybe the other weighs more than the next. But there's democracy. Look at Malaysia!

...
...
...

Sorry, bad example. What I mean to say is, criticise if you must! But be gentle! We will work hard for New York, New York to be a memorable event, not just a party with suits and dresses.

And it's still not too late. Do come, those who are not coming. We promise you'll have an enjoyable time.

Till next time, folks!

Broken Pieces

2010-11-09T09:03:00.000-08:00

I know SPM is just a few dying days away.

I know I should be studying full time.

But sometimes, I take a break, and stop, and stare into space.

Into nothingness.

I take a moment to look into the past.

I take a moment to look at the broken pieces.

I then remember what made them broken in the first place.

Foolishness.

Good luck for SPM, all.

Smile and Die

2010-11-07T08:23:00.000-08:00

I rarely find anything worth blogging about, don't I? Ashes to Flames is basically about feelings, girls, mindless rambling, feelings, girls... and feelings. I mentioned feelings, didn't I? Yes, feelings.

2010 has been different to me. Well, every year is, but then... 2010 felt significantly different. I learned about how complex feelings can be, the depth of feelings, their ever-changing chemistry between people and just how very tiring they can be to normal teenagers like you and me. Sometimes borderline suffering.

I've discovered of how to actually like a person.

Discovered rejection (indirectly, mind you.), and how bloody hell painful it was.

That spike, blasted spike from the pits of the underworld, a piece of Hades' own black soul, just puncturing your heart like a buttering knife slicing a bun...

You get over it.

Weak. Hurt. Bloody. Teared up. You get over it. (yeah, you do.)

I'm alive, aren't I?

So like the opening scenes from Halo: Reach, you pick up your assault rifle after a long day and just walk up that hill to get a face full of sunshine... the new horizon!

And you just see another bloody day coming your way. Horizon's there, but it's dark red and screaming at you. Sure, birds fly and the sun shines, but the heat gets to you, and that deja vu from the previous battle stirs up your insides.

You get ready your gun, but you know, once it's over, it's gonna start all over again. The same hill, the same anticipation for a happy ending... but a different horizon with a new kind of horror. Sometimes you wish you were just dead, and heck with all this.

It's just not worth it.

Or maybe you're detached from all of it? Hide in the shadows, and strike from within the shadows. Like the lone hero from Assassin's Creed: Brotherhood, you have nothing to lose and you just work it all until the end. No one's waiting for you once you're done, so just end it all with a jab of that hidden blade.

No one knows, no one cares.

I can't say much. What I have locked in my mind can compromise everything I care for. But I do wish someone can unlock them. Anybody willing to do an extraction from my dreams like Dominic Cobb from Inception?

Then you'll get to see my dreams. Dark, blank, empty and meaningless. Yet under that seemingly plain blanket a sea of storms pulses, sucking in everything that gives me peace and serenity.

I try to make people happy. I try, I really do. And in the end, I get shot in the heart. But I don't care. As long as that person is happy... what can I do?

Smile and die.

xD

*This post has nothing whatsoever to do with anyone real, fiction, or even dead. Not related to anyone. No. Not really.*

*Maybe one.*

Guys in Suits and Girls in Dresses

2010-11-02T02:21:00.000-07:00

You know, funny things happen when you wake up from bed one day, crave for a sandwich, look around the kitchen and realise there's no bread, then remember you're supposed to feed the cats because it's half past noon, do a head count for your cats and make sure they don't run off to some neighbour's lawn and get hit by a 4WD--

I'm getting ahead of myself here.

Anyway, back to the bread. After all the chores (that I remembered by far) were done, I went to the 7-11 to get some bread.

For my sandwich.

And because I was to stock up on bread that week. Actually, last week.

So. I entered 7-11, gave the store cashier a hearty wink, and strode around doing business (collect the bread). After carefully reviewing the contents of a chocolate bar and a fizzy drink, with the loaf of bread in my hand, I walked to the counter...

...when this happened.

Yes. Yes. It was like that and more!

And more! (I couldn't remember the third one's face)

Why are all these smokin' hot, ''gun'' (note the inverted commas)-wielding, sexy scorchers inside a small little 7-11in a suburban neighbourhood and I'm just standing there with a ''I'm a Virgin'' t-shirt and banana shorts??

Even the dumb cashier dropped his jaw (I bet his pants too, but I couldn't see because he was behind the counter) and stopped playing his PSP.

I did not know what was happening. Probably a teen gang heading for a friends' wedding? Lost and stopped for a can of soda? I looked outside, expecting to see a Lexus Rexton with a sandy-haired guy and a roguish grin behind the wheel, calling out, ''Come on, girls, we're gonna be late for the wedding!''

Instead I saw a roughly-eight-year-old boy, in the passenger seat, poking his head out the window and half-shouting, ''Kakak, hurry up! Aunty Cei Cei's (I think it was Cei Cei) birthday laaaa!''

And it was a Toyota Wish.

Girl Number Two, which I'd like to nickname the Black Mamba of the East was at the magazine rack. What a fine rack it was. I always picked up my issue of Gempak! there, so I proceeded as so.

She was reading a magazine with a close up of a man in a suit on the cover. My thoughts went to the legendary Barney Stinson of How I Met Your Mother.

I sniggered unconsciously. And the Black Mamba of the East caught me!

''What's so funny?'' she asked, her voice striking the still air and interrupting the God of War sound effects in the cashier's PSP (obviously three un-Earthly beauties did not seem to bother him for long as Kratos's, the front man of God of War, bare chest and abs splattered in monster blood were far more interesting for him).

She talked. To me! I choked. Regained myself. And spoke with careful care.

''Eh... guy in a suit. Funny.''

*loud groan from audience*

What did you expect me to do?

''Hey, dollface, my house just a couple blocks away. What say you and your friends?''

The Black Mamba of the East laughed, and put the magazine away.

''I like guys in suits.'' and she winked. She winked. The Black Mamba of the East winked at me.

And she left. With Girl Number One aka Vienna Jackpot and Girl Number Three aka Faceless Rack and that lucky, lucky, lucky eight-year-old boy, off to Aunt Cei Cei's birthday party, in that white Toyota Wish.

I think she gave a glance at my banana shorts.

I paid for my stuff and left.

Black Mamba of the East... I will find you. One day.

And wink back at you!

Thanks, folks.

This is not a dream sequence. Some elements were obviously exaggerated ( Girl in a bikini walk in a suburban 7-11) but the core of the story is true. There were three hot girls. One of them said ''I like men in suits'' to me. And the wink. And the glance. Well, maybe not the glance. Do not judge me.

Break Free! RENGEKI!

2010-10-20T08:12:00.000-07:00

I will feel better when I post this up. I am so stressed right now. My results weren't bad, but I'm not happy with them. And that's just Trials. Teachers were sympathetic, and passed me on a couple of subjects.

I so do not need pity. What I need is bloody strength. And the guts to be truthful to myself. To her. To everyone I know.

I will kill SPM ( meaning, just pass it with flying colours ), go to college. Finish studies, and start anew.

I do not want to be grounded. Lemme go free. Gimme my WINGS! Ever heard of the Wings of Liberty? That's what I want!

That's what I need.

And I want love.

And since I'm at it, I won't mind world peace, too.

I'm gonna break free of this, and no, I'm not breaking into a High School Musical number!

No, no, no!

Can I go ''Na, na, na'' instead? Gerard Way kicks ass, and that ass is Zac Efron's.

EFF YOU, STRESS-MITES, IMMA GONNA COUNTERATTACK YOUR MENTAL ATTACKS ON MY BROKEN SOUL!

I need my guitar, so, ciao, folks.

I'm gonna start a comic soon. Check my FB page in a couple of weeks. What's it about? Imagine Scott Pilgrim feat. Green Day in a Malaysian high school setting.

Story of a Hoodie Girl

2010-10-16T04:07:00.000-07:00

A quick one before I scoot off to a film festival at the PKNS Tower in PJ with my photographer bud Daniel...

I was on the way home from tuition today. Bloody tiring it was, and it was blistering hot. I've always had the LRT as my mode of transportation. I passed through the terminal with my Touch 'N' Go card, waited, got on, got off and walked home. Never paid attention in the in-betweens, especially in the coach.

But heck, today was different.

A girl with a striped hoodie walked by and took the opposite seat of mine. The caption on her hoodie shirt caught my eye, ''Forget it. Yesterday is history. Tomorrow's a mystery.'' Yeah, cliched, but it got me thinking of my own problems with girls lately. And I stared.

Hair tied back with a bang, just a allowing a strand of hair falling over her face. Lovely brown eyes behind a square-rimmed thin spectacles, and the cutest nose you've ever seen. She was texting a friend at that time, probably, because she had her phone out, and smiled the tiniest of smiles.

It was... just too distracting, that smile.

And she caught me staring. I quickly looked down and pulled out my own phone.

The whole way to my stop we kept stealing glances at each other, always avoiding direct contact. I'm probably imagining the exchange of glances. She did catch me staring at her.

I wanted to say hi. I really did. I wanted to comment on her hoodie shirt.

But I didn't. Got scared. Just got off my stop without a word.

I'm gonna ride the same LRT line next Saturday. See if I can catch her again.

That lil thing you do -- lying -- I can bloody well see it!

2010-10-11T11:36:00.000-07:00

I woke up late today. Usually my time's at 5.00am but I got around at 6.15am. Of course, after a quick shower and that treasure hunt for my under-- I mean neck tie, I started the walk from home to school carrying around 15 SPBT textbooks which I was supposed to return (yes, I'm missing two textbooks; don't blame me, I'm only human!).

Then this happened.

''Dude, your class (5C) has its book-returning session tomorrow. Today is 5B's turn.''

See, no one actually told me that.

Well, that out of the way, it turned out to be quite an interesting day. No class, some noobs had their Accounts exams, free period all day. Class-hopping joy, what fun.

''Uh can we borrow Bob for a moment?''

''Sure,'' *raises eyebrow in a very suggestive way* ''what for?''

Ah, and there was that little fight in which I got roped into; some relationship crisis. I didn't ask to be a part of it, I never wanted to, but fate's just mean sometimes, and before you know it, the boyfriend wants to pull my guts out through my nostrils and the girlfriend wants me to be her output for tears.
I was nice, too nice, like someone pointed out, and went along with it.
And this is the part where it got cool. I mean, really cool. Really cool. Let me try that in Italic and Bold. Really cool. Well, in my opinion anyway.

''Is he mad?''

''No, he's not!'' *eyes looking down, nodding while saying otherwise, raised voice pitch*

''You're lying.''

''Look, he is not mad and I am not lying!'' *repitition of statement* ''Look, I thought you wanted to help me!'' *changes subject, classic deflection*

''If you're lying to me, I can't do squat. I need to know what exactly happened.''

*sighs* ''Okay... this--''

Whoa, spoilers there, and there's that confidentiality agreement. I helped the girl out, but she was trying to cheat me by trying to cut me from the whole truth. I got everything out in the end, using that simple technique of just looking into the face. Face-reading, a deception expert would call it.

Deception expert is a real occupation. The science of FACS (Facial Action Coding System) is applied here. Discovered by Dr. Paul Ekman in 1970s, the good doctor theorised that every face that showed emotion, any particular emotion, joy, hate, contempt, surprise; all of these emotions had their own specific features formed by the facial muscles, and it's the same for all humans. Yes, it's universal. If Obama and Clinton had something to hide, they'd have the same look on their faces, eyebrows joined together, upper eyelids raised while lower eyelids tensioned and the muscles around the mouth tightened. The look of fear of that secret to be found out.

Spawned a TV-series too. Season 3 up this October.

I'm not saying I'm as good as that bloke up there, or any of those scientists. But I love learning the technique. True scientist say this is BS, since psychology plays a large part in FACS and psychology has been acknowledged as ''soft science''.

I'd like to think I saved someone's relationship today. But since I did play a part in destabilising that relationship somewhere in the past, I'm too ashamed to say it out loud.

There's another technique in detecting a lie, that is by body movement. The scientists call it ''gestural emblems''. A gestural emblem is something the body does involuntarily because of the loss of synch between mind and body when the person lies. This lost synchronisation however can be overcome if the person is a pathological liar, someone who has full control over his muscles, thus disallowing any involuntary movement.

An example of a gestural emblem is the defensive posture. When a person lies, and the lie is opposed by the listener, the liar will go into a stance called the defensive posture, crossed arms, chest in and usually followed by a few steps back. These movements show the need to reinforce the lie, withdraw and defend. We have President Obama for a demonstration.

Though we can say Obama is just being defensive in this picture; I mean, it is a talk with the opposition.

The involuntary muscle movement on the face is harder to catch, according to deception expert Dr. Ekman since usually the liars are betrayed by their emotions within a 1/5 of a second. A hidden smile, a look of contempt, a flash of fear, or the dilation of the pupils. A quick and sharp eye can catch these looks.

FACS is a lovely thing, don't you think? We really should appreciate Dr. Ekman's work. A deception expert is on my list of careers now.

In the end, emotions betray lies. Philosophic, eh?

The Post-trials One

2010-10-10T08:04:00.000-07:00

Ey. This should've been done by Friday, but I was busy. Or lazy. Whichever you prefer, really.

First thing, though. Hui Jan, this won't be about FACS (Facial Action Coding System) no, but something else.

Not really a good start there, isn't it? Well, I'm not sure myself, so let's just call this post the Post-trials One, since everyone seems to be happy about the ''post-'' in the word ''Post-trials''.

Now this blog... I set it up a year or so ago, so I could write about stuff. Type, sorry. Express myself, you know? Being a teenager and all, and expressing yourself verbally in your house doesn't actually help a lot. I mean, your 9-year-old sister can't help you if you're suffering from internal conflict of which even you can't describe specifically yourself, can she?

Thus, the purpose of this blog. Well, it's helped me. I can just bloody well post anything I want here, and no one would care. Well, some people care, but I don't really care about them not caring, or caring otherwise.

I'm on a rant here, I have no idea what I'm saying.

I'm relieved, as most people are, because SPM trials just went through. Can't wait for the results *nervous flinch*.

Lots of stuff happened this past few months. Time as a carefree teenager runs out while that looming 12-gauge pump-action shotgun of responsibility just smirks at you from that corner turn; the same corner turn in which someday you're gonna turn around. You get older, wiser. Well, some, dumber.

Experience adds up over the years, but things never change. That's what they say. But really now?

Never?

Well, I'd say never say never, mate.

I just did say never in that sentence which proposes to avoid usage of the word ''never''. A big loophole in that philosophy, eh? I wonder which idiot came up with that.

I bet you're totally confused now. What the hell am I talking about here exactly?

Well, that's your answer. I'm confused. Emotionally, my mentality and my sense of the future is very, very, screwed up right now. I know what to do. Yes, I know what steps I'll be taking once everything is done during this high-school time. Afterwards and forward, yes, I have the vague outlook of what choices I'll be making.

But I am confused. Because, really, nothing's ever clear is it? Well, no worries, though. I'm gonna find out.

Care to join me?

What Happens Next?

2010-09-22T02:32:00.000-07:00

Hey, folks. This is probably the last post before I stay off the Net for two weeks for SPM trials. Need to get this do-hickey off my chest.

Everyone, and I mean everyone has been thinking of what to do after SPM. College, work, and so on. I haven't been thinking much, thanks to my immaturity, and really have been living in the moment. Too much, I would say.

It was these couple of last months that I began to grind on my thoughts of what to do when SPM wraps up and I have the results in my hands.

Before this, I've wanted to take Law. Law sounded good, works good, and pays good as well. It was really all talk with lawyers, because these blood-sucking leeches knew how to play around with words and facts, manipulating people's mind. The truth's still the truth, but if one really mastered Law, he can change the way people look at the truth.

KDU offered a good course. Bachelor's Degree of Law, 2 years in Malaysia and one more in UK, an example of one of the programs.

But there's been a definite increase in people majoring in Law. And because of that, most of them are unemployed. Sure, I'd like a Bachelor's Degree of Law, but if I can't work and earn, what was the frickin' point?

My cousin, who had a degree in Pharmacy and recently returned from Bali in Indonesia, suggested that I take Radiography. Radiography was in the medical field, but it didn't require the course-takers to be excellent in Biology or Chemistry, and it was all memory work. Memorise how the X-ray, CAT scan and MRI machines work and learn to read the results through the medical images.

But I wasn't actually a fan of working in hospitals. Sitting behind a machine and checking a man's insides were a bit lame for me, even if you can boast that you know how to operate an X-ray machine.

So, for now, I've decided on the two-year-six-months Creative Media Design course at KDU. Creative Media Design offers the same basics like Illustration in One Academy, though more computer-software oriented than hand-made. Plus, I can concentrate on improving my skills in photography since it's a subject. I'm still considering for Law, and I even might continue for Law after I have my Creative Media Design diploma. Which probably meant that I'll be done studying in 6-8 years.

My Dad wants me to continue the cycle of the family tradition and take Mass Communications and become a journalist. ''You can become anything if you major in journalism-- it's the jack of all trades!'' says my Dad.

But no. Journalism is something both my parents have done. I want to make a new path for myself. And let's face it. Journalism is the freedom to express through literature. I'd be joining politics in a few years. And that's the last thing I want to do.

Even my class teacher says I'm destined to become a politician.

Well, no. A lawyer-photographer I will become (either one) and a hard-boiled one at that.

See ya folks. Wish me luck for them dreaded test papers.

Dedicated to the late Bunny, Madeleine's Pet Rabbit.

2010-09-16T08:43:00.000-07:00

Hi, folks. Sorry for the very late update. I've been sick, then busy, then sick again, and busy yet again, then Raya celebrations were around the corner and I just didn't have enough time.

But I think I have enough time for this.

I was at the train station today. On my way home to KL. When I boarded the train, I got an SMS.

The day turned slightly bleak when I read that message.

Madeleine's pet rabbit, Bunny, died today.

I met Bunny for the first time, at Madeleine's Chinese New Year open house, last year. Cute lil rabbit she was, and I regret that I didn't have my DSLR that time to take a picture of her. She hurt her leg at that time, so she was limping. But Bunny was an adorable little fluffy... well, bunny.

I met her a few more times over this year, and even petted her a bit. If she didn't have that limp, she would've been jumping a lot around Madeleine's house. But she was determined, one night, when she hopped delicately into Madeleine's lowered hands.

Madeleine loved Bunny. She still does. Bunny's been around for eight years, and the photos of her with that rabbit really could move a heartless guy's heart like mine.

It's never easy losing a pet. My cat Lilo died in a car accident a year back. I didn't cry; I even made measly jokes about it at school. But I really did mourn her loss when I'm alone, knowing she'll never brush past my ankles anymore.

Miss ya, Lilo.

The bond between a pet and its owner, something like Madeleine and Bunny, it's not something to be lightly taken of. ''So what, she could get another one,'' Sure. But not all rabbits are the same. Not all pets are the same. One's just special for that one person, and that's what makes the love even... stronger; unique.

I'm sorry for your loss, Madeleine. I really am. Bunny was a great rabbit. She's gone now, but she'll remain as a wonderful memory for us all.

Bunny knows you loved her, Madeleine. She wouldn't blame you because you weren't there when she passed. And knowing you cared and loved her for eight years made it easy for her to pass on. You love her, and she knows that, even though she's gone now. As much as you love her, that's how much she loves you back. That's the most important thing right now.

Bunny, I'm sorry I couldn't get to know you closer. I would've love to have you pose for my DSLR. And for you to meet my cat, Shiro. You would've been the best of friends.

We all miss you. Madeleine the most. Rest in peace, Bunny.

The Emotional Spectrum!

2010-08-21T10:39:00.000-07:00

Hi, people! I've been saving up this post for quite a while. It's an intriguing one; not sure if anyone's going to agree with it.

But hey, if I write a blog that's supposed to please everyone that comes across it, I should work for the government.

I was joking, ISA agents. Really. I love our Prime Minister.

Anyway... my topic for today: the Emotional Spectrum.

Oh, I just love topics about emotions, don't I? I am so gay. Not like Edward or Jacob, though, no matter how immortal or how hairy they are, respectively.

So! Recently, I've read this comic book (while I should've been studying) from the DC comics print, a crossover event which involves all the legendary superheroes coming together for a spectacular team-up against a horde of evil enemies (oh, the cliche) entitled Blackest Night.

Blackest Night was an interesting read, praise-worthy artwork and suspense-filled storyline. I'm not going to give this comic book a review, no, we leave that to the critics. No, I want to elaborate on a plot key that was mentioned in the comic.

Very fictional in some cases, but somehow it reflects upon the reality of our daily mundane lives, which is why modern comic books nowadays are so believable.

The plot key: the emotional spectrum!

Now, a brief description of the emotional colour spectrum and how it fits into the story. Screw spoiler alerts, this comic was out for a while. Our story begins when the dead begin to rise thanks to black rings which suddenly fall from the sky. These rings have like an automatic pilot system and seek any dead fellow's ring finger. Once the ring is placed, the dead dude rises, and begins killing the living, via tearing out their hearts and then eating them. This allows the other black rings to wear themselves on the recently deceased, and we have more ring-powered zombies, and the numbers increase, world wide. These dead fellows are known as the Black Lantern Corps.

There are seven other Lantern Corps, and like the Black LC, they have a specific colour which defines their emotion. Black, is of course for the dead. There's the Green Lantern Corps, and the ring-bearers are bona-fide will-powered beings. Will is their strength. Next, we have the Blue Lantern Corps, and they empower hope into other people in times of despair. Needless to say, hope is their greatest weapon. We then have the Indigo Tribe, powered by their feel of compassion. And at the end of one side of the emotional spectrum is the Star Sapphires, and their power is the violet-themed love. Now, we move to the negative side of the spectrum. On the right of the green power of Will is the yellow light of fear. These folks instill fear in other people, so that's their thing. And then we have avarice, greedy beings which use rings powered by orange greed. And on the end, opposite of love, is the red rage of the crimson-coloured anger-management-issues punks, which are so brutal, if they have their hearts ripped out, it won't matter because their Red Lantern rings serve as their new heart to pump all that rage tainted blood.

From the left we have the emotions of Love (violet), Compassion (indigo), Hope (blue), Will (green), Fear (yellow), Avarice (orange), and Rage (red). The Emotional Spectrum of colours.

If you don't notice it, the emotional spectrum is like a meter, which of course varies in your emotions, each of them different with their own colour. Just imagine a needle pointing to either of those rings. It goes without saying, that the emotion of will is the most balanced of all, as it resides right in the middle. Yes, love is a good emotion, but it strays too far from to the left, thus never achieving equilibrium. Compassion's nice too, and so is hope, but none of these matter if you don't have the will for action.

Oh, I'm loving the colour of green.

On the right side of the emotional spectrum, we have the more negative effects of emotions. Fear? Fear is good, shows that you're human and you are afraid of something, but too much fear and no willpower at all, you'll succumb. Ah. Avarice, or greed. Need I mention more? And there's rage! Never a good emotion, even if the situation demands it. I tell you, those Red Lantern freaks in the comic cough up their own blood to drown their enemies. That's just gruesome.

Just another meaningless post. Next to Hui Jan's two Ramadhan-dedicated blogposts (I feel so guilty, and I'm the one fasting here) this post just sucks.

But I had to post it up anyway. Tell me readers. Which Lantern Corps do you belong in?

Amirul Shakir is in a relationship

2010-08-18T05:11:00.000-07:00

Before you get all ''WHOA~ really?'', no, I am not in a relationship. I'm merely picturing what would happen on Facebook if I were in one, and decided to update my status as so.

So the topic today... a common one I would think, if you stuck around long enough reading my blog; it's about the boy-girl relationship.

Now there are two kinds of the usual boy-girl relationships.

Number One, as friends.

Oh, nice to meet you.

Second one, I think is normal as the first, as lovers.

Take my hand, and I'll take yours... *fluttering butterflies*

Of course, there are others such as brothers and sisters, cousins and whatnot, but today we're gonna focus on these two rather common ones.

Readers, I honestly tell you that I prefer the first one. Yes, you can have one girlfriend at a time, but when it comes to girl-friends (not lovers, no) you can have as much as you can. No attachments, just joking, laughing, smile-sharing people, helping one another out in times of distress. This is the preferable one, especially in dangerous times of high school. When you got friends of the opposite sex, you know you're metro-sexual. So, don't pal around in the same species; go out there and spread some love. (The love of friendship, I mean.)

The second one. Ah. These are dangerous waters, dear readers. If you taken an alternate road on the branch of friends and aiming to be ''more than friends'' you've arrived in the dating-relationship zone. Two people, have the same feelings for each other (what they really feel is entirely another different matter) and decide to stick together to see what happens. Some are successful and continue throughout their lives, while some... well, just ugly. Not being a pessimist here, but ugly boyfriend-girlfriend relationship outcomes are like the signature trademark of high school monkey love.

The basis for the second one is a crush. You start out with a crush, and if you have the guts, you can continue as so and achieve the lovers' status. But this also requires the right time, the right place and most important of all, the right feeling. Of both parties, mind you. You can't add a positive and a negative, you'll get a negative. But if you add a positive with a positive or a negative with a negative... you'll get a positive!

(+) + (+) = (+)
(-) + (-) = (+)

Oh, I love relating these topics with Maths and science. It just makes them tough academic subjects funnier than what our teachers intend it to be.

Oh. One more thing. I'm currently within the first choice, having girls as friends. No idea about the second one. And to you dolts who think I'm with Madeleine Teh, please don't think so. Both of us are in the first type of boy-girl relationship, though it's much crazier. I think I might be something of a gay best friend (yikes). But I have to admit, the ''fling'' with Hui Jan and Jacie prove to be much more crazier than all the other girls I've met.

Like Sean Ding said, ''wah, from Maddie to Jacie to Hui Jan. You certainly are the player this Puasa month,''

Dude. Prepare for a flying kick tomorrow. I did get lighter this past week, you know.

An eye for an eye makes the world go blind...

2010-08-16T04:51:00.000-07:00

This is going to be a very serious post. I'll try to be a bit humorous in it, but I doubt I can.

Now, it's the month of Ramadhan, is it not? Time for patience-testing and willpower, and so on.

There's the buka puasa time every evening at 7.30+. It's supposed to be family time, where everyone sits around the table, waiting for the time to come in to break the day-long fast. Then when it's time, we say our prayers and eat, as a family.

I... don't like it. I'd rather eat alone. It's not that I don't appreciate my dad, mom, the sisters and the 13-year-long-in-service maid, but I hate it when we discuss an issue.

Then I see how nasty my family can become.

Today we discussed about Osama bin Laden and his family in Mecca, because my parents just came back from there. Mecca's economy is being ruled by the Laden family, even in Osama's disappearance, due to his wanted status. His family has done a lot of stuff for the people of Mecca. Hosting free buka puasas, donating to local mosques and such.

I respect that much of the Laden family; and Osama as well. But what he did during the 9/11 attacks were too much.

Please just forgive what my mom said.

''The Laden family is taking orders from Osama himself, the States just don't know it. A lot of good he did for the Muslims. I don't blame him for the 9/11 attacks.''

I was shocked. Thousands of people died in those attacks, sons lost their fathers, husbands lost their wives, lovers lost their beloved, and my mom said Osama was right in doing so.

I countered, as politely as possible,

''People are still people. You don't just chuck out a life like that. And we're talking countless of lives here.''

Before my mom could reply, my maid jumped in from the other side of the dinner table.

''Don't judge him on what he did. People may say what they want about Osama bin Laden, but he's still a hero for us (Muslims).''

Screw what she said, I never liked her anyway. I shot,

''Even after all those people died? INNOCENT people? There's blood on his hands! Killing innocents is what Muslims are against as well!''

Dinner turned into a debate when my mom pointed her finger at me and hissed,

''Very well, then how about the people in Gaza? How many innocents died there? Israel, supported by the people of the States, ravaged their homeland, burned their crops, destroyed their houses and murdered their children in cold blood! Osama bin Laden demolished a few buildings while Israel, backed up by the oh-so-just USA raped an entire nation! Amirul, please don't justify on what the Israelis and Americans did, because what Laden did was fair compensation.''

My dad was sighing and at that time I knew I should stop. But not without the final comeback was uttered then I left the table.

''See, mom, the problem with an eye for an eye is, in the end, everyone goes blind.''

I'm so sorry if I don't have that semangat jihad. People are still people. Taking lives just to settle scores is not humane at all.

Mom, I hope your inhumanity was just because of the stress of fasting.

And screw you, maid, I don't care about you.

The 5th Annual Cultural Night

2010-08-10T08:06:00.000-07:00

7th of August was the night! The night of all nights (apart from prom, but hey, we don't know anything about that yet,). Readers, it was the 10th Petaling Scout Troop's annual Cultural Night!

For the past few weeks, it had been tiring work, getting permission letters, planning plans for the event, firewood-collecting, and the impressionable decor-art, but in the end, we had everything done before the CN itself.

Okay, to be frank, the starting was a bit slow. After serving the food, people were getting bored. However, performances like Xin You's unorthodox Justin-Bieber-remixed-Baby, made the crowd laugh, and the senior Scout girls' Malaysian dance (thank Tharini for that) scored some strong applaud from the audience.

But the tipping factor was the Dikir Barat. It really got people hyped, and we even had the audience joining us!

That Dikir Barat really works for all events. It even worked during Kem Integrasi.

Anyway, the event was a success, and it was the last of the 2009/2010 COH's duties. From that night on, all the tasks were bestowed upon Chu Szi Wei and his COH of 2010/2011. Good luck, dude!

Below are some pictures. Thanks for reading!

the firelighting part! my thanks to Daniel RS!

Tarian Malaysia, Tharini's proteges!

Dikir Barat, anyone?

''Heartbeat''

2010-08-03T05:22:00.000-07:00

Hello. Not a bad day today, despite the week of increasing insanity. Got my Biology exam results, and the marks weren't bad at all.

Highest in class (psst, A-).

First time, you know. Last exam I got a C+. Well, nothing to brag about. But still, I can be happy can't I?

That's surely redemption enough for all those classes I purposely missed.

Anyway.

Today there was a small competition; a poem recital thingy. Teacher informed me last week, but I accidentally (or secara sengaja since I groaned audibly when she told me) forgot about it and didn't come up with any poems at all.

The recital was right after school, at 2.45pm. I remembered about it at 2.00pm.

If you think coming up with a poem is easy, think again. I squeezed my brain of all its juice trying to come with a theme.

Joy, sorrow, food, love, suicidal or politics?

And I just came up something which was dark, but had love as the central theme. Call me mushy, but this got me second place. Not bad at all!

It's called, as the title suggests, ''Heartbeat''.

The stillness and the cold
The frights of which I could not bear
A frustrated and frosted soul
Waiting for non-existent warmth
The light that will never reach me

I need a heartbeat
A surge of oxygenated blood
And let it liberate me from darkness!
Always overwhelming and undermining
The darkness in all our hearts

Let break the glass of illusion!
Unleash pride and glory
And set aside doubt and hatred
And love will be found
Everlasting and ever-binding, love

Love, wings that let the heart soar
Love, a rose that blooms in the heart
Love, an eclipse of the soul

Let love be, and love be a heartbeat.

Note: I was half-asleep when I wrote this. Don't blame me if it's too depressing. I just wanted to get back to sleep.

I'm actually quite proud of it. I mean, second place is better than third place!

And yes, the oxygenated blood was a reference of my Biology marks. Hehe.

Thanks for visiting, and I sincerely apologise for my ego on this post. Bye!

Flamethrowing Final Ride

2010-07-31T09:21:00.000-07:00

Well, folks. It's been another crazy week. As SPM Trials closes in, the level of madness in school just increases until you want to bang your head on the nearest metal pole (which I have tried, quite satisfying effect).

I almost lost my certificates, due to parents' intervention in my after-school affairs. Lost my nerve, popped a vein, went into cardiac arrest a couple of times, but I got through. Not alone, no. Got some help from some admirable friends.

Thanks, fellas.

Everything's on borderline fine now, and I have one more event that I need to go through before I put everything, and I mean everything, down.

The 10th Petaling Troop Scouts 5th Annual Cultural Night.

Ooh, I went to the 4th Annual CN, and it was really a fascinating evening. Everything was done by the seniors of 2008/2009, with some minor help from the juniors. Towering gadgets, classy art-by-hand banners, the fiery firelighting gig, and the original performances.

This year, it was the seniors of 2009/2010 turn to orchestrate the event. We're picking up pace in preparing the entire show which will be on the 7th of August.

That's 4 days before the fasting month starts, and 3 days before my Prefect step-down ceremony.

Everything is slowly wrapping up for the Form 5s, eh?

Before you know it, an official SPM question paper will be shoved under our noses by those grim-faced Exam guards.

Bloody SPM-shivers.

Right. I'm not sure whether this is a happy or a sad post. Happy because I'm finally leaving teenage immaturity or sad because I'm stepping out of high school and into the real world?

Oh, those questions never bothered me before.

Always me and my beloved DSLR.

Gah, enough of that! I'm going to enjoy these last two weeks, no one can stop me, I think I deserve it before I submit into chains of revision-slavery, and since I'm in charge of firelighting in Cultural Night, I'm going to make the whole event flammable, so flammable that a miniscule surge of static electricity can cause the detonation of a hydrogen bomb!

Like Amy Holland says it...
~ She's on fire! ~

We'll poke that storm in the eye

2010-07-27T06:07:00.000-07:00

I haven't been involved in anything.

I don't have a right to say anything either.

That storm, yeah, that one.

I was lucky because I had my umbrella.

I'm grateful but I watch in sorrow as some of my pals wade through those dangerous waters.

Into the eye of that bloody storm.

Today, one of them said, ''No, I don't think it'll end. It'll only get worse.''

I respectfully disagree, bespectacled midget.

(I do hope I was as vague as I was insulting in that one.)

Yes, that storm will keep going. For the worse. Okay, that part I agree. But it'll never end?

No, no, no.

It will end. It will. You just have to hang on. Shut your ears, close your eyes, and just feel the rain on your face. Let people say what they want to say, it'll die away. But don't you die along with it.

All those lies, half-baked truths, misconceptions and chaos theories are bringing you down.

You're strong, stronger than that. What, half-baked cheese gonna make you sick now?

And if it does bring you down, push you to tears, destroys your well-being... just remember.

You're not alone. You never were, anyway.

I'll be there, he'll be there, she'll be there, everyone will be there and we'll grab your frail hand and pull you out from all that hate and greed and nonsense crap and we'll screw that storm, right in its bloody evil eye.

Hang on, hang on. It'll be over soon, and you'll have a beautiful sunrise and well-deserved peace.

Patience, midget.

What's Her Name Again?

2010-07-22T08:35:00.000-07:00

Thought I ran into you down on the street
Then it turned out to only be a dream
I made a point to burn all of the photographs
She went away and I took a different path

I remember the face but I can't recall her name
Now I wonder how whatsername has been.

Seems she disappeared without a trace
Did she ever marry ol' whatsisface?
I made a point to burn all the photographs
She went away and I took a different path

I remember the face but I can't recall her name
Now I wonder how whatsername has been.

Remember, whatever
It seems like forever ago
Remember, whatever
It seems like forever ago

The regrets,
All useless in my head
She's in my head,
I must confess

The regrets,
All useless in my head
She's in my head
So long ago.

And in the darkest night
If my memory serves me right
I'll never turn back time
Forgetting you, but not the time!

---
Well, since everyone else can post up lyrics, why can't I? And there's more to this song than its music. The lyrics just hit you. You know of those songs that you think are written and fleshed out just specially for you?

Well, Whatsername is the song for me.

Special thanks for Green Day for being around and introducing this song to the world.

The Eternal Rose

2010-07-19T04:40:00.000-07:00

Hey, hey, hey. Do you guys remember my old blog? Yeah, the pinky-pink one, one that I had to decorate with Barbies because I lost a bet to a certain She-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named?

Well, do you remember the story I typed out, The Gallant Rose?

I have a new one. It's not a follow-up of the story, no, but rather a spiritual succession to the last one. And yes, it does involve a rose. Thus the title of this blog post.

Tell me what you think, eh? Will The Eternal Rose be better than The Gallant Rose?

This one is dedicated to the fantasy-novel nuts. Read on!

-----The Eternal Rose-----

No one knows how it all truly began. It was a ludicrous illusion, a manifestation of the impaired, a dream.

But everyone knew it was all because of a rose. It was a crimson rose, red as the blood that flows through your veins. Its beauty was of a passionate carving, the hands that made it of excellent craftsmanship. The scent that it puffed out was the smell of agonising lust, dazing those who sniffed it with momentary euphoria.

Down it came from the heavens, answering a little girl's call. Divine spirits blessed the flower as it touched the girl's homeland. Within seconds, just like the flower itself, the land bloomed of green meadows filled with insects, rivers with splashing fishes and frogs, and the sky boasted its blue and the sun's blazing sunlight.

The people of the land, and the girl, called the miracle flower the Eternal Rose.

And for a while, there was joy.

But like every tale of joy, there always must be a small piece of evil.

Evil manifested itself in the form of a black, hideous dragon, its scaly skin as tough as the hide of a mammoth, and its ivory fangs and claws sharp enough to rip out metal. And just like the flower, the dragon came from a wish.

A deformed wish.

The dragon was envious of the Eternal Rose, and hated it with every fibre of its body. So down it swooped onto the Spot of Birth, the place where the Rose was planted, and yanked it out of the ground, with its mighty lashing tail.

The meadows died. Insects shrivelled and entered death. The fishes and frogs danced no more in the polluted river. The skies turned dark and sinister thunder-bearing clouds obscured the sun.

The black dragon laughed, and laughed, as the people cried of their destroyed homeland. It flew away, flexing its wings and causing hurricanes. The leaves of the trees were swept away with tears of despair.

In his dark lair, the dragon prepared for the destruction of the Eternal Rose. Its death will signify the dominance of evil in this realm of reality, something which the black dragon desired most.

And along came a knight in shining armour.

The knight was fully armoured, from head to toe. In his hand hand was a broadsword, its hilt encrusted with precious stones. Symbols of magic and divine spirits were carved onto the sword, and the lights danced upon them.

The black dragon roared, and a great battle began.

The knight struck and struck, but the dragon shimmied and sideswiped, avoiding the edge. Once the dragon opened its mouth and a fireball erupted from its throat. The knight stood his ground and a shield was handled, deflecting the fiery death attack.

The dragon then brought its mace-like tail onto the knight. Again, the shield was used to parry, but the knight was unfortunate this time.

The mace hit his visor, and the knight's face was revealed.

It was not a he, but a she.

It was the little girl who had wished for the Eternal Rose from the divine spirits when her dream was melded into reality.

The black dragon was shocked, and stood dumbfounded, exposing his heart while all this time he guarded it well.

And the knight thrust the blade forward.

The grounds shook, and the lair's ceiling crumbled to bits at the dragon's roar of pain, the sword sticking out of his chest. Blood flowed from the wound, and all the dragon could hear in his last moments was the sound of his fading heartbeat.

The knight took the Eternal Rose, freed the sword, and escaped the lair, as it collapsed, forming the Tomb of the Black Dragon, a perversion of history.

The girl, now without her armour, but plain normal clothes, carefully planted the Eternal Rose in the Spot of Birth.

Cheers erupted, and the beauty which the black dragon stole was returned to the land. Joy, happiness and love, it was all that mattered to the little girl as she whispered to the Eternal Rose.

''I thank thee, Eternal Rose of the heavens.''

------

Hope you readers enjoyed it! Thanks for visiting!

The Best RM1 of My Life

2010-07-18T07:40:00.000-07:00

Hey folks. Thought I'd be different today, and try out center-spacing and the Arial font for this post.

Anyway.

So, how many of you has been hit by a car? *leave your comments in the chatbox at the side there, hehe*

Okay, I'm guessing a few readers out there are answering, 'Once, I think.' 'Uhh, not a car, but a truck.' 'Hmm.... does a bicycle count?'

Well, not to make a big deal about it, but I got hit by a car today. Yeah, a gay-blue (cyan, if I'm not mistaken) Proton Saga. Alright, so it's not something to whoop about (though I daresay it's on a higher standard than being hit by a bicycle). And no worries, I wasn't hurt at all.

I bet Ishaq just went 'Aww, dang!' on that one.

No, no. The real reason I wanted to blog about this lil accident of mine was because of the story behind it. Some people might find it idiotic, ridiculous, and quite possibly reckless. But hell, it was as funny as the time Bala exposed his underwear in the Chemistry lab while cleaning the blackboard.

*psst, the colour was grey. Look out, girls.*

So! It was a sunny day, wind was blowing, bird were chirping, and I could hear all the happy voices from the old folks' home across the street (''Nurse, why does my napkin smell funny?'' ''Sir, that's your underwear.'') I was walking home, back from 7-11 with a paper in my hand and I was looking forward to getting home because Iron Man was on HBO HD later that time.

Maybe it was fate, maybe it was a sending, I don't know, when I realised a crisp one Ringgit note on the bitumen-laid ground.

Common sense would have left it alone. Bob Shakir's sense, however, was a different thing.

Though there was money on the ground, I took the necessary procedure of crossing the road, just like what it said in the big book of scouting. Look left, look right, and then look both ways again. And Amirul Shakir went and crossed the road.

I should have just crossed and snatched the money from the road.

But no. Either it was stupidity or common sense, I stayed in the middle of the road and checked to see if the bill was the real deal. Well, I thought the road was empty.

I thought wrong, because five seconds later, a speeding Saga burst from a junction and headed my way. Of course, I didn't see it. I was busy examining the Agong's face on the bill. The driver of the Saga didn't bother to honk before he hit me either.

Have no fear, folks, because I was lucky.

The driver did see me nanoseconds before he hit me and slammed on the breaks. However, thanks to inertia, which in turn is supported by Mr. Ng, our school physics teacher (good teacher, *ehem*) it didn't stop the car's bumper from hitting my right shin.

There was that instant impact and shock, which was nothing actually, but I did like throw myself over the car's hood. And when the car stopped, the honk blaring as the Saga driver pressed his hand on the honk everlastingly, the pain came.

But it was nothing much. I was on my butt seconds later. The driver frantically climbed out.

I thought I was gonna get the usual ''You idiot! Who told you to stand in the middle of the road like a flag pole (do flag poles stand in the middle of the road?) like an idiot?? Who's gonna pay for the dent--''

Yeah, that's what I thought, when this old, bespectacled Chinese guy who looked incredibly like Mr. Ng except for the head full of white-grey hair came out of the Saga. Again, an illusion of an angry driver popped into my head, but this time, in Mr. Ng's image. ''Itulah, stand in the middle of the road. Berdosa tau, nanti mati pergi neraka--''

But instead.

Saga Driver: OH MY GOD!! ARE YOU OKAY?!

Me: Yeah, I'm not hurt bad...

Saga Driver: YOU SURE?! DO YOU NEED TO GO TO THE HOSPITAL?!? OH MY GOD!!

Me: No, I'm pretty sure I'm okay... just a small scratch is all...

Saga Driver: WHERE DO YOU LIVE?! DO YOU NEED A RIDE HOME?! OH MY GOD!!

Me: Oh, it's okay, I just live right over there--

Saga Driver: COME!! I TAKE YOU THERE!! OH MY GOD!!

And despite the multiple 'No's that came out of my mouth, I was dragged into the Saga, while the driver kept exclaiming ''OH MY GOD!!'' over and over.

So I got home. Thanked the fellow. I think he said, ''You're welcome, I'm so sorry, OH MY GOD!!''. He was a cool guy. Panicked a bit, but at least he didn't mind the dent in the bumper that I caused.

I didn't tell my parents about it. Nah, they'll worry. I checked and I'm pretty sure it's just a swelling on my shin. By the time I typed this out, the swelling's gone down. The pain's still there, and I limp a bit, but it should be gone by Tuesday. Just in time for football in PJK.

And in the end, there's that crisp, off-the-road, accident-inducing, worthy, lucky, fateful, destiny-locked, RM1 in my wallet.

Really, the best buck of my life.

Thanks for visiting!

The Atomic Gang War: Sometimes, People are Stupid

2010-07-15T01:34:00.000-07:00

I am so gonna get killed for putting this up. Some might call me hypocritical.

But, I do have freedom of speech. So members of any current gang wars in any particular schools; screw you.

I might be exaggerating when I say gang war, but when I look at it, it certainly does look like a gang war.

Two sides, two armies, two conflicting interests, and the climatic showdown which usually ends up in tears. And no, not tears of victory. There's also the occasional third party which reinforces the rules of the environment, which is the no violence rule, but usually they get ignored. In this case, the prefects.

So, readers, let's begin the psycho-analysis for these meaningless gang wars!

It usually begins with one group, society, an entity, one might call it. Now, like the bonds of solid matter, the chains that holds the society together are tight. But like Chemistry as well, external forces can eliminate those bonds, no matter how strong they are.

So an outside force says hello to this entity, and like all then-perfect relationships, atoms within the society form cracks, and finally break off from each other.

And now we have two atoms of the same entity. Usually one will be stronger than the other, and the stronger one will be dominant.

Eventually, the much weaker atom will soon disintergrate into nothingness, due to the stronger atom's heavy pounding, who, in its own course, rallied other atoms to its own personal cause.

You follow? No? Oh well.

Once upon a time, there were two best friends. Now, these two were the best of best friends and nothing could break them apart. Or so they thought. One day, someone with high sex appeal came over and said hi. One thing led to another, and there was a fight.

Soon, there were armies, and the two sides fought for eternities and scorched the earth. In the end, no one could tell that the particular battlefield they fought on had once been the birthplace of a beautiful friendship.

No, I'm not indicating anyone. I've heard too much, I've seen too much, and I could guess what will happen next.

But I won't take sides. That would be stupid. Nor would I join the third party to uphold the authority's rules and regulations.

All I'm saying... is that all of you are being stupid. I'm sorry, I know, there are faults and wrongs somewhere, and there might be only one guilty party, but honestly, it takes two to start a war. Three to make it chaotic.

There's also the idiots signing up for it. What the heck, you morons?! WHY do you want to stand out there and watch it? You think it's a frickin' free show? You want to cheer on for them? You fools like feeding off people's despair?!

You like seeing people cry?!

I understand the ones who felt the need to stand up for the friends, especially for the weaker atom. Being good friends are what you are. But the ones who just walk by and then suddenly go... '' Ooh! I wanna join! I'll take that side!'' Eff off, you stupid, stupid, idiotic, dumbfucks.

If you want to participate, how about you relay the truth, the exact truth, to everyone who doesn't know. Let those clueless ones know that's it's a big misunderstanding, words were said, hearts were broken, but it's on its way to be healed.

It's all just a misunderstanding. People said this, people said that, and something happened. But just know it'll be okay; don't worry about it.

C'mon la. Does a feud have to continue until one of the other falls down? Does the other end have to die of defeat and forever be silenced, then everything will be all right? Where's the good old-fashioned ethics of friendship and trust?

Is sorry so hard to be said? To be meant? To repair something that's damaged, and that damaged object was something you use to treasure. Now, you throw it away like a bottle of bad coke.

How about forgive and forget? You'd forgo that for search and destroy, I'd say.

We have to learn that people make mistakes, and that's inevitable. Sometimes that's just a test for us, to see if we can forgive ourselves, others, and say sorry to those we hurt.

I've said enough, I think. Wouldn't help anyone anyway.

I hope everything will end in a good way.

No more tears, please.

The Last of the Malaysian Girls

2010-07-10T06:23:00.000-07:00

You have no idea of how many hours I stared at this blank box, thinking of something to type about. Seriously. So many things happened these past few days, yet I've no inclination to elaborate about those events, except that they were quite uncomfortable.

Enough of that, now! So instead of brainstorming for another couple of years, I've decided to blog about these girls. No, they're not the Last of the Malaysian Girls, but they're certainly brilliant, funny and pretty, and no, the last part wasn't bullshit. Well. Maybe for Hui Jan. I'm JOKING!

And please excuse the title, I'm so hooked up on Green Day's the Last of the American Girls. Have you seen the music video? Oh, you should. Finger-pointing-explosive melody, that one.

So, readers, let's begin with Girl Number One!

Hui Jan / Jan / Boss (as I call her)

Yes, that's Hui Jan. Don't mess with her fellas; she's the Discipline Officer I in our school, and man, she packs a mean can of whoop-ass. Her smile is as nasty as her roar. Ha-ha, I'm joking. No, Hui Jan is actually a cool girl. She's one of the few girls I know who shares my liking towards Green Day. Though she loves these punk-rockers from the marijuana-induced band, she's also smart. Damn smart. If you read her blog, you know she's an avid player of Scrabble. Have you seen her play? I did. I play Scrabble too, and thought I was good at it. That's until I saw Hui Jan play... my playing skills were like child's play compared to Hui Jan's. She plays like a Titan from Greek mythology. No, it's not exaggeration, you fools! Another thing about her, you can see the fine line that divides Hui Jan into funny mode and serious mode. She's ferocious and mean when time demands it, and she's understanding and kind when the situation is light. You have to respect someone with that rare ability. I can't be serious. I'm too immature. Thumbs up, Boss!

All right, let's move on to Girl Number Two!

Jacie Tan Cheng Hwee / Slit-Eyed Japanese Girl (she looked like one during Citrawarna, with all that spiky hair. Mind you, they were really spikes with the amount of gel that was used.)

She's the girl on the left, readers. One word before I begin about her; crazy. Don't get me wrong; it's the fun and good type of crazy! She gets even crazier when she's with her crew! Don't get me started on her group of friends. But you can't be angry about that! I mean, yeah, they once hijacked my DSLR; got pretty pissed about that, but then I laughed when I saw the pictures they took. Do you wanna be angry when you see a picture of girls posing their butts in front of the camera? Fully clothed, I repeat, fully clothed. I laughed until my lungs collapsed, and then deleted the picture. I'm pretty sure my mom wouldn't be happy with that kind of picture in my DSLR. Yeah, that's Jacie. Crazy reader too. Right now she's going on and on about a book called Fire and seduced (I wonder if this is the proper term) Xin You to read it. He loved it too, and he said it was about the girls (that's understandable) and the humour in Fire that makes it a good book. She's as fun as she's crazy, and among all these girls, she makes me laugh the hardest. Though I never really admitted that to her. She's the kind of girl who can raise your spirits too. When you're feeling down, this girl will slap you and say, ''Buck the f*ck up, idiot!'' Well, she never actually did that, but the energy's there. That's what I think of you, Jacie. Awesome and another thumbs up!

Hello, here's Girl Number Three!

Yap Ee Leng / Mada / ''T'' (her favourite letter on MSN)

One of my best buds. That's Ee Leng, and yeah, she's cool. No, no, not ''cool'', but cool. Note the Italic usage. Yeah, and whenever I'm blur on Chinese culture, she sits down with me and explains about that particular matter. De facto points. She's like my own Wikipedia. I'm a fan of anime, and this girl is too! There was a time when we used to swap stories and once, both of us got hooked on this show, Code Geass. Have you finish watching it yet, Ee Leng? She also introduced to me the fantastic sea-plant, the abalone. Before that, I thought abalone was some sort of fish. And I still am shocked such a small plant costs a lot. Ee Leng's a great listener as well, and with the next girl I'm about to type about, they're the best pair of pals that's around. We really need to go to an anime exhibit sometime, Mada. Don't worry, tickets are on me! And of course, you get a thumbs up!

Ehem. Step up, Girl Number Four.

Madeleine / Maddie / Mad / Mom (she really does act like it, sometimes)

Last girl, but of course, not the least! That's Maddie Tsl, and boy, she's hot! Fellas (boys, esp) she's available. Wooh! Anyway, this girl is like my sister. Really. Sometimes my mom. ''You look like a drug dealer with that hoodie!'' ''But I like hoodies, Mo-- I mean, Mad!'' ''We need to get you new clothes.'' In the end, she bought me a ''I'm a Virgin'' T-shirt for my birthday. When teamed up with Ee Leng, like I said before, they're the best at looking out for me. They even forced me to have my own birthday party! Not that I resent it, gosh, I loved it! Being another of my best buddies, she's awesome at art. A couple of days she's been working off her-- erm, let's just say energy-- to finish her batik for her arts project. She says it's not proper and looks off, but heck, me and Ee Leng said it looks awesome. Stylish. Ee Leng even admitted that it looked like a fashionable mango, but then again, she was hungry at that time. Like Ee Leng too, Maddie is a good listener. Gives good advice as well. That's why sometimes I call her ''Onee-Chan!'' which is Japanese for ''Big Sister''! Though without doubt, I am bigger than her. Great Big Sister though. And that certainly earns her a thumbs up!

So. These are but the few of the girls in my life. There are others, and one more I'd like to type about, but I'm gonna leave that to rest. Quit raising eyebrows, I know what you're thinking. If you don't, just nod as if you do.

I have to repeat myself that these girls are brilliant, funny and pretty. Yes, Hui Jan included. Excellent friends, what a person like me would hope for. If you're raising your eyebrows again, I do have guys as friends also. But I'm gonna save that for another post.

Ladies and gentlemen, this is truly the Last of the Malaysian Girls!

She puts her make-up on
Like graffiti on the walls of the heartland
She's got a little book
Of conspiracies right in her hand
She is paranoid
Endangered species, heading into extinction
She is one of a kind
She's the Last of the American-- err, I mean-- Malaysian Girls!

Thanks for visiting, folks!

I'd Stay in the Middle

2010-06-25T03:46:00.000-07:00

This week... the first week of the second semester... what was thought to be a full-scale attack on my mountains of notes and homework... turned out to be a regular task of cleaning my camera, transferring photos, and trying to survive in the small opening between two major clubs which have been rivals ever since before World War I.

Yes, I am talking about the infamous and glamour Interact Club, and the honourable-than-thou Leo Club.

I'd like to point out that both clubs are great, and I really like both of 'em. Tho I am leaning a bit towards the Leo Club. Sorry, Interactors.

Throughout the entire week I've been performing last-minute miracles with undone reports for the Editorial Board, and capturing pictures of Annual General Meetings of both Interact and Leo. Yesterday I kept jumping from the Interact AGM to the Leo AGM (one AGM was in 4 Adil, while the other was in 3 Jejarum).
Put a fat guy in front of countless flights of stairs, and you get a miracle if the fat guy survives when he's done with them.

Despite all that running and puffing and almost ripping my underpants when I tripped at the canteen stairs, I'm glad I'm involved with these clubs (tho unofficially) because I get to delve into these clubs' histories, and their senior and more experienced world-class parent organisations, the Rotary International and the Lions Club International.

Though I am perplexed with their goals and causes. To me, they're almost the same. Aren't both of these clubs formed ages ago to help the community? Yes, different perspectives and mottos, but their agenda and methods are similar. Presidents, Sectaries, and even their International Understanding days (some Leo Clubs prefer it to be called International Relations to avoid confusion) which always are held to contribute to charity!

Yet there exists a rift between these clubs. Try mentioning the Leo Club in an Interact meeting (at least in SMK SAS) and the members will boo.

And since I am the neutral party here (being a photographer for both clubs' past events) I have to be honest. There are some flaws which don't usually mind the members of each club. Some will notice, but they'll shrug it off sooner or later.

Needless to say, the Interact Club flourishes with members. Their membership database, compared to the Leo Club, is admittedly impressive and usually beats memberships in all other clubs (scouts, dance club, chess club, etc.) . Their events and charity concerts always attract large crowds, Interactors, Leos, and even those who wish to be none (like moi). But when it comes to goals and causes, it is the Interact Club's greatest weakness. External significances such as the glamor, popular friends, parties and concerts and statuses are the real magnets for newcomers to join the Interact Club. There was once a time where the Interact Club was indeed fun and noble, but as the century chips away, the members enjoy more of the fun instead on focusing on the honour that was once bound to the club.

Am I lying? Sorry, folks. Take a look at Sri Aman's Interact IU. The performances were indeed for a noble cause; human trafficking. But due to the organisers' heavy mention on women and children being sold as sex slaves, aided by some uncontrollable hormones of several in the audience, the event itself was a shame to Interacts all around the world. Not to forget, the after party which all the attendees agreed was 'the highlight of Sri Aman's IU' instead of the message that was trying to be conveyed. Heavy drinking and such continued in the after party.

Just bear with me; I am trying to be fair here.

Enter the Leo Club, its symbol is the mighty lion, which shows courage and valor. Leo itself stands for Leadership, Experience and Opportunity. The reason I favour the Leos a tiny bit more than the Interacts is because that though the club has a smaller membership, and lesser independent events (most Leo events are joint projects with other schools' Leo Clubs), the Leo Club hasn't lost sight of its original focus, to provide the youthful with chances to improve the world. They have stayed true to the Lions Club International motto, 'We Serve'. Yet, there is one small flaw that puts the Leo Club in the same disdain position as the Interacts.

In the Leo Club of SMK SAS, racial integrity is almost at lost. Most of its members are of only one race, and a small portion of another race. The last race which describes 1Malaysia is not present, therefor breaking the illusion of racial harmony of the Leo Club. Other Leo Clubs have the same problem as well and like one of my Leo friends said, ''At the forum, mostly all the Leos from other schools were Chinese.''

These two clubs are actually excellent proteges of the major organisations. But if they can fix those small little problems, they can excel and move forward with more confidence attracting more members for their causes.

Personally, I think it'd be better if the Interacts and Leos merged their clubs together. Sure, there would be a riot and such, but if everyone just gave it a chance, there might be a possibility that they can succeed.

Interacts and Leos; you've been helping people a lot. How about a change, and you help yourselves out this time around?

Thanks for visiting, folks.

(This is a response to Hui Jan's post of Sri Aman's IU, Breaking the Silence)

The Insane, the Supernatural and the Reporter

2010-06-22T09:34:00.000-07:00

I don't know what I'm doing; I just updated yesterday! But this interesting fact I've discovered today about my dad really made my day. This one's for you, Dad.

So, have you guys ever heard of Mona Fandey? She was a Malaysian pop singer, but when her attempt at national popularity failed, she became a bomoh (local shaman), offering services to supernatural-fanatic clients. Soon, aided (or misguided) by her insanity, Mona Fandey became a murderess, after she committed a gruesome act of murder.

Yeap, that's Mona Fandey. Crazy black magic witch.

Her horrific acts included dismembering the victim's body into 18 body parts after the husband (also a loony) chopped off his head with an axe. The victim was also partially skinned and his remains were kept in Mona Fandey's basement.

The victim was a political figure who wanted Mona's service, believing Mona's connection with the spiritual world would gain him political immortality. The operative word here is political. Mr. Immortal Politician gave Mona and her husband a deposit of RM500000 and 10 land titles (the amount that Mona demanded was RM2.5 million for the service).

During the ritual, out of crazy reasons, Mona and her husband murdered Mr. Immortal Politician and hid his body. They proceeded to spend the money on a Mercedes-Benz and Mona got herself a facelift.

How nice.

Which wasn't quite wise, because later the police tracked Mr. Dead Politician's tracks back to Mona and after a look at her finance account, they concluded that Mona Fandey was indeed responsible for Mr. Dead Politician's disappearance.

Mona Fandey and her husband were finally apprehended and a publicized trial was on its way. Of course, the couple was deemed guilty and sentenced to death by hanging.

Out of all the articles I've read, they always mentioned Mona's strange behavior near the end. Though she was faced with death, Mona was smiling all the way, posing for photographers and seconds before she was hanged, she commented;

''Aku takkan mati. (I shall never die).''

Creepy, eh? This leaves a gap of uncertainty, especially for the supernatural fanatics.

When my dad was in his prime, a journalist for The Star, he was one of the reporters who followed the investigation closely. Though my dad refused to comment much on the subject, he did admit that he was there when the police apprehended the culprits and when they raided the insane couples' home, where they not only found Mr. Dead Politician's mutilated remains, but weird items which included preserved human body parts in jars.

My dad quit his job right when the trials started, deciding to start a business on his own.

My mom said when Mona Fandey was on the loose, she threatened that all those who were involved in the investigation, their families will be at mortal peril. That curse is done now, since Mona is... well, dead.

Yes, the story is very dark and not much humorous, but I applaud my dad for taking part in an investigation which captured the most vile murderess in the history of Malaysia. Job well done, dad.

Thanks for visiting!

Maddie's in Moscow, I Love Illegal Networks, and School is Cool

2010-06-21T08:24:00.000-07:00

Due to Miss Jacie Tan Cheng Hwee's nagging, I am obliged to post another update on my god-forsaken blog. Then it occured to me, that nothing interesting actually happened during the holidays, other than the outings, which I've already posted up.

So... what should I blog about today?

Nothing, eh?

Guess I'll bore you with unexciting details then.

Maddie has gone on a trip to Russia to visit her brother and won't be back for a week. We all really miss her, but Imp the most (Imp's the guy in 5B, with the long nose and the squarish, sharp jaw line). I've sent her an SMS saying we're all glad that she arrived there safely, after she SMS'ed Imp, saying she touch-downed in Moscow. Imp strong-armed her to do it. Poor girl. Rates in Russia aren't actually cheap. Well, it's his head.

If you kept up with my Facebook status updates, you'd know that I'm currently obsessed with thepiratebay.org, and yes, it's an illegal network which houses billions of unofficial torrents for god knows how many media items on the net and in the world. Yes, I know we've all been warned not to download illegal items off the net, but let's face it, who wants to pay a RM100 for a one-season, thirteen-episode DVD when you can wait a day while your BitTorrent program downloads it? It's the same with DVD piracy in Malaysia, and that's why it's still going strong. And it's not just movies I'm downloading. Over the past few weeks, I've discovered ancient issues of forgotten comic books, which are almost impossible to acquire nowadays. But again, with thepiratebay.org... need I say more?

I'm sure DRS can support me there. Eh, Daniel?

And oh, who can forget school? A place where a thousand or more students are huddled together, and subjected to long hours of lessons, with the occassional laugh or giggle, but mostly trying to stifle yawns while the teachers drill their brains with facts that might be useful in their future. Some might find this fun, and interesting. I don't blame them. They must have boring lives at home and being at school is the tiniest bit of fun they can get.

I'm joking. Going to school is good. And if you like it, you're gonna have a bright future.

And I thought I was a prefect.

I'm at the end of my tale and I have some photos to sort. 6019 photos, in fact. Taking up most of my laptop hard disk. But no problem. Recently bought a 500GB external hard disk and I must say, it's more useful than the measly 2GB, 4GB, 8GB, 16GB, 32GB pendrives. And it has an internal fan!

Bye, readers!

Happy now, Jacie?

I'm Not Half-Boiled Anymore!

2010-06-12T09:07:00.000-07:00

I have two things to blog about today. The first, would be about Puan Maha’s farewell party which happened yesterday. The second, is my birthday celebration at Sunway Pyramid, happened today, just a few hours ago.

Let’s start with Puan Maha’s party. The party was at 2.30PM, at a northern Indian cuisine restaurant (I think) in Sect 14 going by the name House of Pakeeza. Weird name, nice food. And we all know (well, those who do know me) how much I adore food. Especially good food. It was a fancy, quiet place. Atmosphere was quite pleasant. We all sat down and ate nasi briyani, mutton, tandoori chicken (with some green paste which I know wasn’t wasabi but tasted great anyway) and papadums. Ah, fresh papadums. And they kept piling up on them salty crackers. Puan Maha related to us some funny stories while we ate and laughed. One included on Aaron (2008-2009 Head Prefect) discovering his interest in photography by taking pictures of girls at public places.

Then came the photo session. Ishaq, Aqeemul and I brought our cameras which everybody played with them (Jiunn Jie tinkered around with Ishaq’s, mine was reserved by Hui Jan, and Aqeemul’s was passed around like a rental). One-on-one with Puan Maha, single session, group gender photos, and one that included Khairul blocking Puan Maha in one gigantic hug. Go fat guys! Whoop!

Presents were… well, unique. Girls got Puan Maha a makeshift tiara. Chee Hoe got her a scythe. The scythe did emphasise her manner as a Grim Reaper… and me, Ishaq and Herman pooled our money to buy her a disco ball! Puan Maha was grateful, thanking us for it being ‘big’. Yeah, and we told anyone who asked that Herman donated the ball.

The bill situation was fun too, though I won’t talk about that tale too much. But in the end, it was all manageable. And guess what? Puan Maha still had one more week of staying here after the holidays before she leaves for Sabah. Another great whoop!

Pictures will be at my Facebook page under the album Lawgiver’s Farewell.

What? I wanted a nice name for the album.

Anyway…

Thanks to Maddie Tsl and Yap Ee Leng, two of my close buds, they have pushed me to orchestrate my birthday celebration. Yes, everyone had fun, but let it be known, I am such a terrible planner. The only get-togethers I can organise is a get-together-alone.

Yeah, that was a good one right there, wasn’t it??

So, guest list was 11 people. Actually there were more, but couldn’t make it. It’s okay, fellas, I had a nice time. Just sorry you couldn’t come.

Arrived at Sunway Pyramid at 10.20AM, thanks to Felix (he can DRIVE). On the way, we got a lil bit lost and some minor swearing, accidental mind you, because I messed up my letters in the words ‘’Parking Fee’’. So me, Maddie, Imran and Felix.

While Imran tended to his girlfriend, also a guest on my list, me, Maddie and Felix met up with Ee Leng. Bought movie tickets too for the 1.30PM showtime of the A-Team. Then began the hunt for my clothes. Maddie (acting like the big sister I never had, or worse, my mom) wanted to get me new clothes since she said I looked horrible in hoodies.

I love hoodies. Love. Hoodies.

In the end I got a shirt bearing the words, ‘’I’M A VIRGIN (This is a very old T-shirt)’’. The trend was not new, but I loved it. Thanks Maddie.

Then we met up with Ishaq (enjoying hot chocolate outside Starbucks), Afiq and Sofiah and Tharini! Maddie wanted to get Tharini a dress too, but I didn’t see what she bought. Too busy looking at the guitar pick that Ishaq bought for me with the laughing skull. Loved it, man.

After a few more hours of walking around Sunway, talking, making jokes (Afiq insulted Felix; something about cats) then it was time for the movie! That was my first mess-up! There were 11 people! But ta-da, I bought ten tickets.

Me, being noble (or foolish, like the others called it), let myself be left out and let the others watch. But when Ee Leng SMS’ed me, saying there were a lot of vacant seats, me, being sneaky, sneaked through the cinema exit door, entered the theatre and watched the A-Team for free. Yeah, I was a couple of seats away from the gang. But hey, it was FREE!

The A-Team was awesome. Coolest movie ever. The action, humour, drama were all mixed in one blockbusting margarita. Don’t forget the explosions. Gotta love ‘em. And the part where the tank flew out of the sky, landing in some poor German fisherman’s pond, cheating by killing fish with dynamite.

After the movie, we had trouble finding lunch. Lala’ed here, lala’ed there, and finally settled at a place called Sakae Sushi. Nice place, nice food, amazing prices. Amazingly pricey.

Ate, laughed, and almost panicked when Afiq wanted to order a Sake bottle which cost RM25.90. Price wasn’t so bad. Heh.

Ishaq and Felix had to go early. Thanks dudes, glad you two came! Imran and his girlfriend resumed dating, I didn’t mind. Go on, have fun! It is my birthday! Ee Leng had to go too after lunch. Aaw. Thanks, sister! Afiq went to buy more movie tickets because he wanted to watch Karate Kid with his sister. So me, Azim, Tharini and Sofiah went to archery. I messed up again, almost killing a guy when my arrow bounced off. Sorry, sir. My bad. But I got one in the middle. Ehem. Bull’s eye. And that’s no bullshit.

Soon, Azim had to leave. Thanks for coming, Carrots! Then Imran and his girl had to leave. I say. Well, it was fun having you both here! Afiq mysteriously disappeared. Suspected he went to the arcade because the cinema was near to the arcade.

So I was the only guy with Maddie, Sofiah and Tharini! Lucky me! We went to the Coffee Bean and the first hour was fun when Tharini developed some foam-mustache from her cappuccino. Then Sofiah did some weird experiments with the leftovers. Turned it semi-solid, semi-liquid. And for the next hour, the girls talked about boys, while I sank lower beneath the table. There was something about whales having intercourse resulting in the salt level in the sea. Okay, I’m terrified.

Too soon when everything had to come to an end. Maddie and I had to go home because she left her chocolate for Happy Father’s Day at Imran’s freezer for safekeeping (that’s a story for another time). Said our goodbyes, hugged and pounded knuckles with everyone and off to home with a taxi. Dropped by Imran’s place for the choc, his maid was so nice, and then walked back to my place, where Maddie’s dad was waiting to pick her up. One more goodbye and here I am in front of the laptop typing it out.

Extraordinary. Hope you all had fun, because I did. The whole outing was… what’s the word for it? Hui Jan, do you have a word that can somehow explain this very euphoric feeling? Well, if you do, then that’s the word. To those who don’t know, ask her.

Thank you, Maddie, Ee Leng, Azim, Ishaq, Felix, Afiq, Sofiah, Tharini, Imran and Illyana! Thanks for looking up the word, too, Hui Jan!

Thank you all for making my breakthrough from half-boiled teenager to 17-YEAR-OLD half- boiled teenager into something *insert Hui Jan’s word here*! Thank you!

Thanks for visiting! WHOOP!

The Prologue

2010-06-10T21:58:00.000-07:00

A couple of hours before Puan Maha's farewell party. To those who are clueless, Puan Maha is my school's discipline teacher. And the prefectorial board teacher advisor.

And to those clueless people, yes, I am a prefect. Unbelievable eh?

I was chatting with an old friend the other day. And when I told her I was on the right side of the law (sort of) as opposed to my days in Perak, she went;

'That's amazing! I mean, you used to diss them!'

To which I happily replied...

'Well, if you can't beat em, join em!''

Which all brings back memories of my days as a newbie in the very, very different SMK Sultan Abdul Samad. For one, the prefects are quite... how to say.... brutal face first. Well, prefects at my old school were brutal too, but somehow SMK Sultan Abdul Samad's prefects are more like organized-brutal.

''If the student has touched or in any way assaulted you, you may punch him in the face OR kick him in the balls. Executing both counter-attacks may result in your suspension from the Prefectorial Board.''

Well, they don't have that in the rule book, but if they did, I'd be pretty happy. But more or less, it's like that.

So the real question is... how did I come from hating prefects... to love being one of them? Was it the suit? The power? The less-restricting leash of school rules we have on us? (personally, I like the uniform. Blazers are hot. Hot, I tell you.)

What could I say? I signed up when they were recruiting newbies for a joke. For a joke. And then I saw the whole structure of the prefects. The way they were intergrated into the school, the amount of just power they exert on the students and the automatic image you receive from school faculty by just being a prefect. And I was starstruck.

So I worked my ass off as a junior recruit. Wasn't easy. But it was worth it.

Then after almost year serving under the lawkeepers' organisation, I saw the grittier, darker and more seclusive nature of the prefects. The way you have to turn and twist and that almost impossible-to-resist itch to join in school politics. That image you received of being a golden role model... you have to uphold it because anyone could break it down even after a small misstep.

But hey, no one said being a prefect was easy. And everyone who knows me will know how I deal with such stuff. Joke around the situation. Student enraged and wants to beat your ass after school? No problem. ''Can we reschedule? I got prefects meeting.'' Superior blaming you for doing something wrong? ''Sorry, I'll try harder next time. By the way, I saw how you *insert an embarassing incident in which your superior was involved* and I'd like to help you with it...''

That's how I deal with it and though it has some minor setbacks in the past, I've gotten through it with sheer-- no, not willpower, but rather wit power.

I've been a prefect for almost two years now. Tiring, yes. Looking forward to retirement? Yes. Not going to miss prefectship? No. I am going to miss it. Yes, sounds lame, but being a prefect has made me a better person. And look how much friends in law enforcement I've made.

It's farewell to Puan Maha and retirement for the Form 5 prefects in a few more weeks. Bye for now!

Bobby Blues

2010-06-04T07:04:00.000-07:00

Sorry. I dunno why I said that. So sudden, so out of the blue. So... well, not to say spontaneous. But then again I don't know who to say sorry to.

I got nothing to blog about, actually. And this is sure as hell not a retarded version of Blues' Clues, so no worries.

I've never actually believed in the blues. I mean, what? ''Hey man, what's up?'' ''Oh hi, oh nothing much, just feeling blue,'' ''what the f*ck, is that some sort of disease?''

Oh, ignorant me.

Yeah, once I knew what the blues were, I didn't believe crap out of it. It's not actually feeling sad, and it's not actually feeling like those emo-goths, but the blues were kind of a stand-alone term.

Well, now that I've been infected with such, I came to believe it. I dunno why. There I was, eating a cracker, and whoosh, it came down like rain on me. And the annoying thing is I don't know why I'm feeling so damn blue.

Funny thing is blue is a different meaning with the Brits. ''Oh, feeling blue,'' ''Oh my god, you watch pornography, you bloody fool!'' Oh yeah, I love the way they talk. OK, I'm not gonna go deeper on porno in the UK.

Then I have those self-analysis kind of tests, you know. Asking myself questions in my head. It's like your very own psychiatrist within your consciousness. ''How are we today?'' ''Oh good, good. Can't wait for our session to begin.'' ''Oh and by the way, you left the toilet seat open, Mom's not gonna be happy about that.''

Gosh, what's wrong with me? Lame jokes, man. Lame!

Ehem. Anyway. Started with one question: anything bothering you?

Why, yes.

Do you know why?

No, and if I do, I won't be here talking to myself.

Do you have the smallest of clues of why you are experiencing the blues?

Erm. Sort of. But not sure.

And why so?

Because this is the part where you come in and tell me if I'm right or wrong.

Ah. Care to elaborate your suspicions first?

Well... I think it's girls. But I dunno if that's believable. I mean, I've never had trouble with 'em before...

Until now.

Right. Until now.

Precisely.

So what now?

See, this is why self-psychiatric help is free. Because it only helps you identify the problem. The rest... well, the rest is up to you, dear fellow.

Okay. That was really helpful. Really. But why do you talk with a British accent?

I'm gonna spare details. What goes on in my mind is possibly very disturbing for some. So I've been having those kind of sessions with myself almost everyday. And it ends up with the same thing.

Don't you get it, man? GIRLS! Good grief, get a hold of yourself and do SOMETHING about it!

Well, I was pretty smart to know that it didn't mean I had to go online and check those kind of websites...

So what was it? What was my problem with girls? I don't hate them. No, I admire them. Especially the hot ones. If I weren't lazy, I'd include a picture of me jiggling my eyebrow in a most suggestive way right here.

I don't think they hate me. Do they? I get along fine with them. Always kept my dirty jokes in line with them. Maybe some girls harbor some hatred towards me in a spiritual way? And my spiritual antenna is picking up the backlash of that hate while they hide it behind their faces.

Because let's face it, when girls say something, they mean something else different entirely. It's not like guys. When they say something, they actually mean that. I know you've probably heard of it, but let's just hit that refresh button on the window toolbar...

Guy: I'm gonna watch football.
Real meaning: I'm gonna watch football.

Girl: I prefer to shop at Versace's than Levi's...
Real meaning: Screw Levi's. I wanna shop at Versace's. NOW.

But one thing about girls, well they know how to break someone down gently. While guys can be extremely blunt and hurt someone's feelings, girls can do it gently. I admit girls can do that.

Why the heck am I getting off topic?

Wait. I don't have a topic to begin with anyway.

Maybe I'm being paranoid. I am quite paranoid. But that doesn't justify this, this... blue feeling. Gah.

The conclusion I can come up with from this meaningless rant... after several pointless hours of thinking and more hours of more pointless thinking... when I could've done the dishes, send my prefect blazer to the dry-clean shop or put down the toilet seat...

It all spirals out of control and all down onto my own messed up feelings which I'm relating in a this somehow-very-gay post. I can imagine Ishaq saying, ''Talking about feelings now, are we? Nice. Very gay. Very you.'' Well, just because you have the emotional range of a teaspoon...

Is it because of the girl I like? I mean... I've liked her for a long time already. I dated with this hot chick from Perak to get over her. And it didn't actually work out. Broke off after a month. Maybe because long-distance-relationships don't work and because when I'm with that girl, I keep thinking of another face. Boy, Perak girl must hate my guts now.

I'm sorry Perak girl. I won't say your name to protect your interests. I don't want your friends going like, ''Oh, so that's your loser of an ex-boyfriend. Girl, you suck. Why pick a prick like him?''

And to protect my interests too. I don't want your big-bodied brother (I shit you not on that)
coming to my doorstep on a sunny Sunday afternoon with a crowbar and a gang of angry Mexican cholos carrying around Uzi submachine guns.

Anyway, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to use you as a smokescreen, that was so of an asshole of me. I don't think you can stop hating my guts, but just know I am sincerely sorry about it. KL guys ain't that reliable, you know... not actually boyfriend material.

And to that girl I like... well, you'd probably hate my guts too if you knew I was liking you. You're a great girl and I was lucky to know you. No, I'm not gonna reveal names here. That would destroy me somehow and though this girl doesn't have connections with Mexican cholos, I'd really like to bury this one with me.

I really hope I can somehow forget it and move on. And goodness help me, get these blues off me. Get the f... never mind. See ya.

Citra Warna was a BLAST!

2010-05-27T23:13:00.000-07:00

Hey guys! Sorry late update. Exams you know, those papers on your school desk which somehow challenges your mentality. Studying myself to death. Well, maybe not death, but I have been studying. A bit.

Anyway... Citra Warna. Yeap. Awesome. Terrific. Superb. Amazing. Spectacular. Web of... sorry, getting carried away. I'm mentioning all of Spider-Man's comic series (to those who don't know... it's the Amazing Spider-Man, the Spectacular Spider-Man, and the Web of Spider-Man.)

Alright, off topic there. Yeah, the folks of SAS had a damn good time at Dataran Merdeka that fateful night of 22nd of May 2010. We danced, laughed, cheered, partied like there was no tomorrow, tho there wasn't any drinking, unless you count the mountains of mineral water bottles we downed that night. It was a cool night, but we were sweating and boy, did we smell.

Puan Rema said to us after the event was over: 'now you have that empty feeling in your lives.'

Well, the Form 5s certainly miss those moments. Dancing in front of the Agong and on live national TV! Some Form 4s aren't doing so well. Pity those fellas. You should see their Facebook status updates.

Yeah, Citra Warna was really a fun time in our lives. A good experience for all of us. Look out for Citra Warna 2011, eh?

Thanks for visiting!

Ahaha what a day la

2010-05-18T06:38:00.001-07:00

Can I say I'm tired?

I can? Thank you.

I'm tired. Very. Citra Warna is very taxing. Just had our first latihan pukal today and whoah, was it bombastic. Yeah, and tiring.

But fun. All the hot girls. Heh. Thanks for visiting.

Eternal Spring (Relax, Ladies and Gentlemen)

2010-05-05T09:57:00.000-07:00

I came back from school quite late today. 7-ish, because I was lazy to leave school after 5 (that's when the Citra Warna practice ends). I'm not complaining. I had a nice B-Ball game while waiting. Tho going home was a pain, I managed to get a taxi and arrive home before my mom skinned-- I mean, scolded me.

Naturally, I was exhausted. Walking for 30 minutes, then waiting for another 30 minutes while I fruitlessly try to flag down a taxi. And in the middle of it, some bugger on a bike passed me on the road with his middle finger sticking up.

WTF, man. I think I know you, but c'mon, wouldn't a simple 'Hi' or 'Hello' be fine? You had to flip me off. Does your dad own the road? Or is it somehow listed in your grandmother's last will? I mean, a 'Hey, asshole' would've just been fine too. But no, it had to be your middle finger. What I would do to snap it off.

Oh well, at least I didn't see your hell-spawned face, so that was good. I mean, you were obeying road rules by wearing a helmet (despite having no manners at all) and I'm happy for you (drop dead, man, everyone will be happy).

Okay, out of topic there. What I wanted to say is that as soon as I got home, I did a quick change of clothes and flopped on the bed. It was seven at that time. When I woke up... it was already 12.30pm. I know, wicked, right? I was lucky because I haven't prepared my school stuff yet.

After all stuff was done and done, I checked the Net. And boy, I found out some people out there are not having a good week. Take deep breaths, people. You won't like that negative energy accumulating in your body.

Do it the way Ip Man does it. Spiritually, like his Wing Chun fighting style.

Yeah, Ip Man rules. Oh, and as I was saying...

Quoted from Wikipedia, everyone's favourite online encyclopedia;

Wing Chun (Chinese: 詠春; pinyin: Yǒng chūn; literally "Eternal Spring"), also romanized as Ving Tsun or "Wing Tsun" (and sometimes substituted with the characters for "eternal springtime") is a concept-based Chinese martial art and form of self-defense utilizing both striking and grappling while specializing in close-range combat.

So think of it as like this quote, ''When life gives you lemons... you make lemonade.'' Yeah, the Eternal Spring martial art of fighting is similar. You take an attack, but instead of taking it to the gut, you grapple onto the attack, divert it from yourself and use that opening to counter attack. Smart, eh?

So when something bad happens, you do an Ip Man. Take it, block it, divert it, and strike back. All logic and timing. Girls should know this, since Wing Chun (from what I heard) is used mostly by female martial artists... and some feminists I know. Few men like Ip Man use this style and when you do... well, you get Bruce Lee's grandmaster of kung fu.

Okay, I'm getting off topic again. But you readers know what I mean. Take it slow and everything will turn out right. You just have to suck it up and bear with it. When the time's right, you seize that golden opportunity and show everyone that you can be the frickin' best.

Thanks for reading!

The Terrible Turkeys Band

2010-05-02T04:48:00.001-07:00

Yeah, so what started as a lazy Labour Day for me (no tuition, scored some extra hours of sleep) turned out to be the next step in the formation of a four-piece band.

Yeap, Imp sms'ed me the other day saying he needed another singer to perform in a small event ''Crescent Day''. So I said sure, tho rehearsals can't be on the next day (which was Saturday, Labour Day) because my dad would be home.

So back to the present time, I'm busy listening to some punk-infested music orchestrated by Green Day when I got a call from Imp. Note that my parents were out buying groceries at that time.

Imp: So dude, you can keluar tak?
Me : No, man, sorry. My dad just came back from Ipoh. Family time, y' know? (My dad was
working full time in Ipoh, Perak)
Imp: Really? Because, you know... we're just outside your house.
Me : WTF?

There was Imp, Ishaq and Felix waiting outside with Felix's Kancil car. I was like, ''WTF?!?''. And yeah, I just followed them to Imp's house. I sms'ed my mom that I was going to Imp's place... ''for a short while''.

So when we got to Imp's house, Ishaq started playing ''Stairway to Heaven'' with Imp's piano when he noticed he could manipulate the keys into sounding just like the song. Bravo, Ishaq. Damn cool, because Ishaq didn't know anything about pianos. Felix joined in while Imp explained to me the details of the performance.

We were going to sing ''Carry You Home'' by James Blunt. Imp will be playing the rhythm with his acoustic, Ishaq with the lead and his electric guitar and Felix with the bass, albeit using his acoustic guitar with an audio jack. They needed a singer who could sing low because James Blunt always knew how to hit high and low notes with beautiful melody.

Well, I'm no James Blunt... but I think I'd do pretty well. Nah, just joking. Yeah, so I'm the singer. And before we knew it, we had like a four-piece band.

Just when we about to rehearse... my dad called.

''You had your ''short while''. Now, come home. Your aunt's on the way.''

Oh well. So much for a rehearsal. So Felix gave me a ride back to my house. Imp tagged along while Ishaq stayed and mauled--I mean, played his piano. I got back home before my parents did from their grocery shopping and then spent the entire evening help my mom make burritos until my aunt came. Spicy, I might add. Very.

Imp arranged another rehearsal. Monday, after school. Wooh. Let's hope we can pull this off before Crescent Day.

Thanks for visiting! See ya!

PS: I'd really like the band name to be the ''Terrible Turkeys''.

Champions of 2010

2010-04-30T01:40:00.000-07:00

On this lovely (albeit raining) Friday, SMK SAS held their 44th Annual Sports Day 2010. It's the last one I'm ever gonna have, and I have to say, it was the best. Well, probably because Blue House won the Inter-House championship.

BLUE HOUSE PWNED EVERYONE FOR SPORTS DAY 2010!!!

That's right. Blue House. Won. Beat Red House. We beat Red House. Red House was hogging the title for the last two years, and yeap, finally managed to avoid a third strike this year when our house gained 1000+ points. (Red House only had 900+, boo-hoo)

Alrite, so we lost in the Marching event. And the deco. But who cares when we've dominated the entire Sports Day? HAHA!

Yeah, we were averaging on the running events, because Red and Green seemed to cut pass thru our runners, leaving Blue House runners grabbing second place (sorry, Yellows).

Tho Yellow House did put up an interesting show for the march.

Thirty Yellow cap-wearing midgets marched on the field... singing ''We Will Rock You'' (modified to ''Syahbandar (Yellows' codename) will rock you!'') when suddenly, two Decepticons (Donovan Liew and Ravind Pandian in box-suits) arrived and attacked the party! While the marchers were pleading to Decepticons, a remix version of the Transformers' theme music blared on the Soundmasters' speakers... announcing the appearance of the Yellow House mascot... BUMBLEBEE (Adrian Andre Pereira in a more cooler version of a box-suit). Yeap, Bumblebee bashed the baddies and saved the marchers... who trotted off to a happy ending.

Yeah, it was a simple concept, but very interesting to watch. I really like to post some pictures... but I can't, due to the fact that all the photos I take are property of the school's Editorial Board.

However, I can post these two pictures. Take a look!

Bumblebee and the Bull!

OMG! My lens cracked!

All and all, SAS Sports Day 2010 was a blast. We all had fun, and I really hope it stays in our memories as a really enjoyable event during teen-years.

Oh yeah. Blue House totally PWNED all the other houses in the Tug of War match. It was a record. We beat everyone under 10 seconds. I know. Because I was in it. HAHA!

Thanks for reading!

Don't Know Why

2010-04-25T09:26:00.000-07:00

It's a freakin' backlash. Nobody knows why. But I am seriously hyped tonight! ;DDD

woo-HOO!

Not actually an update, but still... haha! Thanks for visiting!

Little Girl

2010-04-23T02:06:00.000-07:00

Little girl, little girl
why are you crying?
Inside your restless soul
your heart is dying
Little one, little one
your soul is purging
of love and razor blades
Your blood is surging

Runaway
from the river to the street
and find yourself with your face in the gutter
You're a stray from the salvation army
There is no place like home
when you got no place to go

Your traces of blood always follow you home
like the mascara tears of your getaway
You're walking with blisters and running with shears
So unholy
sister of grace.

-- Viva La Gloria (Little Girl), performed by Green Day

Just a song to ease the broken mind. Thanks for visiting.

Busy, Really

2010-04-20T06:23:00.000-07:00

Hey I just found a couple of firecrackers from the last Hari Raya celebration two years ago on my desk. Weird, I know.

Anyway. Thing's kinda busy in school. I've been finding myself running out of class up to five times a day. Ed Board stuff, sports house stuff and even minor Citra Warna business. Tomorrow I have to skip two periods of lessons (Chemistry, YAY) because I have to take pictures of sports day's runners' preliminaries. Just me, Aqeemul and Daniel. Ishaq's having his camera serviced (something about damaged Sigma lens, hah).

Then its back to the sports day junk. Being the Vice President of the Blue House (yeah, laugh it all up) me and Ishaq (Blue House member too) are gonna lepak in the Blue House's secret HQ and finish up our stuff for the Inter-House marching. We've been splashed with paint, sprinkled with glitter, and even fluffed up with cotton balls mixed with Uhu (or as Is describes it, Yoo-hoo) glue.

Thinking about it, I think I've missed Maths, Chemistry and even Biology. Even English, but who cares? No worries. I can catch up. I can keep up. I hope. Heh.

See ya, readers.

Semi-Pro Photography Awesome-ness (as horrible in vocabulary as that sounds)

2010-04-19T04:30:00.000-07:00

Yes la, readers. Joining the school's Editorial Board as a photographer, I've always used the school's cameras. They weren't that bad, but seeing photo-freaks like Ishaq, Daniel and Aqeemul handling big-ass 18-200mm lens-equipped pro DSLR cameras, made me feel jealous. Very. But no more.

That's right, I now OWN A PROFESSIONAL DSLR CAMERA!

Feast your eyes on the Canon Digital Eos 1000D!

Yeap. After starving for nearly two and a half months, I finally acquired the right amount of funds (approx RM1.8k) to purchase this sweet, jet-black snapshot busting baby (I know, weird, but I like how it sounds). Tho equipped with a basic (and sucky) 18-55mm lens, I came to love this camera. No more ogling at Ishaq while he zooms his Dad's pro Nikon camera on hot chicks at Interact/Leo events, no more listening to Daniel comparing Nikon's Sigma lens, and certainly no more of Aqeemul's nags (when I hold his camera, my nose brushes against the LCD camera as I put my eye near the eyepiece, thus staining the screen with nose oil).

I've been telling everyone my dad bought it for me as a present coz I don't want a lot of people to know that I've been carrying RM2k- around in my pocket. (I starved to save, readers. STARVED. To those who know my physique, you should know how difficult it is for me).

Ah, I'm on the road to becoming a pro. I'm still a noob right now, striving to achieve semi-pro status like the others. I'm also saving up to buy another set of lens, the 18-200mm kind, which costs around RM2k. (Another two months of starving, SWEET!)

Ehem. To the pimple-invaded individual (yes, no doubt I'm talking about you) watch out. A flash and a snap, that massive pimple's gonna be on Facebook!

See ya, readers!

Sigh

2010-04-16T04:11:00.000-07:00

I really like her. That's all I can say. Not being emo on this, no way.

Well, maybe a bit. Curse infatuations.

Citra Warna or the Colours of Malaysia, whatever you prefer...

2010-04-14T08:15:00.000-07:00

Sorry, late post. Lots of stuff happening, no time to blog. And I was kinda lazy. I don't know, every year April seems to be my lazy month.

Anyway, happy to announce that SMK Sultan Abdul Samad is selected for the lead dance in the annual Colours of Malaysia event! Wooh! 180 dancers all and all, and we take the main spot, and our theme is shoppers! Not bad, eh? Other schools got orang asli, and fruits, from what I hear.

Heh. Gonna get a frickin' autograph from a guy in a grape suit at the event.

But not all is good news. We're competing for the lead dance with Catholic High School... our trainers say if we don't dance damn good (and I mean, damn good) we might lose the spot to Catholic... something that us Samadians won't frickin' allow!

Apparently the event Colours of Malaysia is gonna be a huge event. The entire Malaysian government is gonna be there, along with the Agong and his lovely Ratu Permaisuri. And a couple of ambassadors too.

So the trainers will be training us hard... three days a week, after school. The event is going to be held at Dataran Merdaka somewhere in May.

Wooh. Can't wait. Will upload pictures soon, if any. See ya!

Awesome... School! (No, Seriously)

2010-03-21T03:59:00.000-07:00

The seconds, minutes, hours and days just melt away when you're having fun. One week of holiday, and all I felt was thirty minutes of bliss whilst slurping on a 7-11 Slurpee Extra Large. Heck, it even felt shorter than that.

Today is Sunday, and tomorrow is Monday. Argh, don't you just hate that end-of-holidays feeling? School's back, and so are the other stuff that's coming in.

Well... enjoy the last pieces of the holiday, people. For me, it's... GUITAR, GUITAR, GUITAR!

Owh crap, the strings need tuning. See ya readers.

The ''I Don't Know What To Call This Post'' Post

2010-03-20T07:01:00.000-07:00

Hey readers. Yeah, I've kinda been ignoring my blog. Sorry. Days come and go, and not a single moment I see that my table is clear of homework. Well, I've never seen it clear before. Not since 2010 started. There's the school DSLR camera I borrowed, there's the can of chrysanthemum tea I was drinking, piles of Star Wars books (I'm a fan), piles of old revision books (weird, they look brand new and appeared to have never been opened) and lots and lots, loads and loads of homework books, papers, and tangles of wires (probably the camera's adapter and my charger, I don't know).

Along with homework, peer pressure came along and wrecked my mental state of mind. That, and a whole lot of problems which I probably can't say here but giving you a hint. Stupid problems really, and I really like to say that I cannot, at all, understand a girl's psychology profile. I can't even understand my mom's. All I know is, it's weird, more complex than quantum physics (which I heard was fun despite its amalgam of conception) and it would take a hundred years for men to research it and write a book about it, and get it totally right. Maybe more than a hundred years.

Last but not least, make sure you got a lot of pals. Being alone is never fun, especially if you're feeling joyous. I mean, who do you want to share all that gay happiness with? Your shoe? Never dispose of friends, or even recycle them. Keep 'em close like your lucky pair of boxers. Or socks. Or whatever garments you prefer.

Hey, hey. This song is cool. Peacemaker by Green Day. Check it out, readers. See ya!

Self-Declaration of Fanatism

2010-03-16T10:40:00.000-07:00

I, A. Shakir, hereby describe myself as a fan of the punk-rock band, Green Day.

Awesome.

Over Your Head...

2010-03-16T07:29:00.001-07:00

I haven't posted in a long time... and I'm posting this coz I wanted to share a song with ya all... Over My Head by the Fray. It's an old song... but it's worth listening to...go on, search the net!

What's New?

2010-03-11T02:22:00.001-08:00

For the sake of update... I'll post this meaningless post. Thank you for reading!

Unleashed

2010-02-18T21:57:00.000-08:00

Dang, the holidays are at an end... once more. They go by too quickly for my liking. Sigh...

Anyway, I've got nothing else to blog about except this: the soon-to-come release of the latest Star Wars video games, Star Wars: The Force Unleashed II. As you've guessed by the title, SW: TFU II is a sequel to the first Star Wars: The Force Unleashed. Players take the role of Galen Marek, Darth Vader's former secret apprentice.

Now, when the trailer was shown at the Spike Video Game Awards 2010, there was a lot of buzz from the fans. In the canon ending of SW: TFU I, the hero seemingly died in matyr style. However, after the trailer was screened, it showed Galen Marek in full strength, sporting dual blue lightsabers (in the first game, he held a red-bladed one). Storyline hasn't been told, except that the game will take place after the first game and still within the period of between Star Wars Episode III and Episode IV.

A new name in the Star Wars Expanded Universe, Star Wars creator George Lucas stated Galen Marek as the 'true' founder of the Rebel Alliance, which will eventually overthrow the Galactic Empire in Episode VI.

To non-Star Wars fans, this might have been a load of tosh. So I guess I'll stop here. Full details of the previous game and Galen Marek would be found in Wikipedia and Wookipedia, the free web encyclopedia exclusively for the Star Wars universe.

Below is a poster of our hero holding his blades in a most dashing way. Later, readers.

Of Princesses and Singing Bards

2010-02-15T08:49:00.000-08:00

It was Valentine's Day yesterday. And a girl did proposed to me. But I think she just slipped it out not on purpose. Heh.

No prob, Jacie. Just looking out for ya. Hey, you're the Princess almost giving up on a gorgeous knight to save you from your locked tower. And I'm just a Bard with a benjo, telling you that that knight will come, sooner or later.

I think this is the third time, but who's counting on how many greetings I give, eh? Happy Valentine's Day, Jacie.

(Next time propose to the right guy. Or rather, let the right guy propose to you. Haha.)

Roaring Tiger, Happy New Year!

2010-02-12T05:14:00.000-08:00

I was so freakin' excited when I heard it was the TIGER'S turn this year for CNY. But before I get all weak in the knees and whatnot, I'd like to wish everyone I know (and the ones I don't) a very happy Chinese New Year. Prosperity rules!

Which reminds me of McDonalds' Prosperity Burgers. Do you know they recently served double the beef/chicken patties now?

Sorry, veering off course there. So, this year's CNY is the Year of the Tiger and this 14th Ferbuary2010's elemental sign for the tiger is the Metal Tiger. Aha, surprised I know this, yeah? Well, I did a lil bit of digging, and it was pretty interesting. I simply can't wait for the Year of the Dragon. Powerful, majestic, mythical creatures, dragons are (even though they're not real).

Here's something else that's as interesting. The white tiger is the Primal Spirit for Metal, or as the Chinese refer to it, Wu Xing.

There's also something about tigers that people born in the Year of the Tiger should be proud about. Tigers show incredible bravery, the willingness to participate in combat and undying courage. They are also described as lucky, lively and engaging. Best protection from the evils of fire and burglary.

Yes, I was quite surprised myself that I took the initiative to find all I can about this particular subject. Anyways, HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR. Go TIGERS! Later, readers!

Lovely Eyes

2010-02-07T01:09:00.000-08:00

I was chatting with an old friend from Perak... and he told me about this lil crush he had on this girl in his class. The way he talked about her, wow, I was afraid I might have fallen for the girl myself. So, pal, I dedicate this little story here for you. That'll be five bucks for this post; blogs ain't cheap.

Haha. Just my lil joke...

So, I'll begin now, eh?

''There she was... (I won't say her name; so I'll describe her as 'she') just came in class a few days ago. I was in the accounts stream, and not many people were in favour for it. But 'she' certainly was. I saw her doing questions before; in front, at the blackboard. Solving those mathematical questions like it was child's play. I think even the teacher was envious of her. Last pop quiz, 'she' was the only one who scored 90% something for it. Oh yes, she's very 'brainy' and god, she is beautiful.

I talked to her a couple of times. She told me that she was half a Malay, and half an Indian. That fact suprised me, and I even held myself back for a moment (I'm sorry, my friend can be a little err...touchy) but after confiding in a friend (moi?) I found myself not caring. She was pretty, smart and so funny. But the thing that intrigued me the most... it was her eyes. Her lovely eyes.

It was a soft brown, not too dark, yet not too bright. It was balanced, and make you think of chocolate. And when she smiled... it was a complete package. Her eyes, her smile... it made my heart leap and beat a million times faster. Have you ever heard a melodious chirp of a flock birds? She laughs like that. I yearn to hear it everyday.

I'm not ashamed to say I've fallen for her. What boy in his right mind won't? I knew this at once when I saw her talking with other boys. It was jealousy; and that only happens if you have feelings for someone.

I hope everyday, that there will come a time, and I'll look into her lovely eyes, and tell her my affection for her. I'll be looking into her eyes then; her lovely eyes.''

Now, he clearly emphasised on the usage of 'lovely eyes'. I can grasp a measure of what he meant. The poor boy's in love; the way he talks about the girl. I really wish I can meet this girl someday. Wow. Later, readers.

ROAD RUN - First and Last

2010-02-06T19:53:00.000-08:00

Yeah, never actually joined Road Run before. But well, since it's my last year, I decided to take part. And I never really realised... it was so damn fun.

The school was in chaos (a good kind of chaos, amidst cheering and chattering) in the morning while all of us took our numbers. We were kinda behind schedule, since the Run was supposed to start at 8.00 but the number taking event was taking a lot of time. So we actually ran the Run at 9.00.

It was kinda refreshing, actually. I started off with a slow jog, but of course, I was eventually left behind. I sprinted a few times, but I daresay I could only last for about 0.5 seconds, considering my size, in those sprints.

Something funny happened near the end. I was metres away from the school, running with a friend. I wasn't actually paying attention to my front -- and believe it or not -- I banged into a bus stop sign post. Yeah, stars were popping around me, but I kept running.

I finally ran the entire Run and I think I was around number 50+. But never mind, it was a good run. Burnt all the fats in me anyway. The sense of accomplishment was really good inside my head and my heart.

Too bad the Road Run's not gonna happen next year again... for me, that is.

Crushes and Infatuations, bah

2010-01-30T23:51:00.001-08:00

It's impossible not to have a crush on someone when you're in school, yes? That lovey-dovey feeling which the ignorant adults sigh, 'Ah, puppy love,' and the frustrating feeling of the heart when we tell ourselves hundreds of time, 'Yes, she's the one,' 'by love, he's Mr Right!' but somewhere, down there, under the cobwebs of ego and pride, lies the nasty thought, 'That's stupid. You're (somewhere between 12--18, I'd imagine), too young to fall in love!'

The British blokes call it, 'infatuations', but my parents call it, 'cinta monyet', a phrase similiar to 'puppy love'. That fuzzy feeling in your chest, that longing you desire when you look into the eyes of the unlucky fellow which you harbor a crush on...

I've hoped I've described these feelings accurately. I may have or may have not felt these, but why bother about me when we can talk about love's long-distant cousin, crushes!

I think I've hit an important topic there. 'Love'. Boyfriends and husbands, girlfriends and grumpy ex-wives! I find my friend Hui Jan's way of looking at it (bah, I'll marry a Caucasian) simply humorous.

All and all... it's along the way of school life. Face it, enjoy it, then cry at it, and learn from it. It's the best we all can do with it. Friends are dears, but life has much more to store than creating simple bonds. Speaking for both love and crushes, these things tend to let us explore deeper into those bonds, giving us a chance whether we are cruel enough to severe those bonds or just make them stronger.

It's just depends on us, what to make of them. Choices, one would say. Later!

21 Guns/Minority

2010-01-23T22:45:00.000-08:00

It's kinda weird that there's a band out there that's named after the band members' liking to marijuana. But hey, there's Green Day.

Awesome songs over the decade, and an impressive amount in the punk-rock band's fanbase. There was Wake Me Up When September Ends, a song dedicated to Billie Joe Armstrong's (lead guitarist and vocalist for Green Day) late father, the heavy-with-sarcasm American Idiot, and the dark and depressing (but somehow soothing) Boulevard of Broken Dreams.

There are two songs which I just can't get enough of, that are, the first, 21 Guns. A slow and melodious violin starting, and passed off to a rhythmic guitar play. And don't forget that awesome electric guitar solo which fits the climax scene of the music video (the hero and heroine kissing amidst bullets flying everywhere). The term 21 Guns mean an official military salute to American soldiers who died in combat. Billie Joe Armstrong's lyrics strongly reflect on how many soldiers must die if they don't even know what their fighting for. You gotta watch the music video. Click here, please.

The second song, as powerful as the first, is called Minority. This time, the song begins with a country-music-like guitar play and is continued with electric guitar jamming. The music video is ... well, no other word can actually describe it except cool. The band is playing on a parade float, decorated with giant hand figures showing the rock and peace sign. The lyrics contain a few swear words, but hey, a little profanity never hurt anyone. Minority shows that even the smallest influence counts, and not to just follow what everybody else thinks. Gotta be independent, no? Take a look at the music video right here.

Yeah, these two songs really rocked me, hope it'll rock you guys as well. 21 Guns is from Green Day's latest album, 21st Century Breakdown while Minority is from an older album, Warning.

I also watched Lady Gaga's music video, Bad Romance. Her performance was pretty good, but dang, the video was weird. Ga-ga, o-la-la...

See ya, readers!

Maxed Out

2010-01-23T09:09:00.000-08:00

SPM maybe almost a year away, but damn, things are getting pretty intense. And us SPM takers are still in January! Homework keeps piling up to mountains, and the effort to finish them all seemed useless with all the extra-activities after school. Yeah, just the third week... and I am totally maxed out (on cash too, mind you).

Damn... look at those books. And that's just one half of the table!

I wonder... whether I'll be taking SPM... or writing my will before the examinations even start. Ciao for now!

Rebirth and victory... double combo meal!

2010-01-23T08:17:00.000-08:00

Hi, readers! Thanks for taking that link! Welcome to ASHES TO FLAMES. As you would have guessed, this blog will be my rebirth in the Net! Gosh, that sounded cool.

To that particular person who's reading this... IN YOUR FACE! I changed the password, so don't bother trying to pink this one up. Haha!

Wow, victory never felt so good. Later, folks!